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FMLs submitted from British Columbia

Today, my mother, her fiancé, and I were having dinner together. My mother was joking that she wasn't sure she could hold him down, as he used to "get around." She turned to talk to the waiter and my future step-father looked me up and down and winked. FML

#18279508
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32375) - you deserved it (2179)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was following my friend to her house in my car, because I didn't know where it was. I'd been following her for at least an hour when she pulled into a gas station. Turns out I'd been following the wrong car. I have no idea where I am. FML

#18225132
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27620) - you deserved it (9407)

On 11/12/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by friedchicken - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I gave my boss a nick name. Everyone thought it was funny. Unfortunately "The Troll" was behind me and heard everything. FML

#18146930
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8765) - you deserved it (39362)

On 11/03/2011 at 12:13pm - work - by hatemyboss - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was invited to a party to celebrate my ex-fiancée's recent engagement. The party is at work, because my ex is also my boss. Her new fiancée is some guy she met while on a "business trip" that happened while we were still engaged. FML

#18142584
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32150) - you deserved it (2559)

On 11/02/2011 at 9:45pm - love - by lebowski101 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was rear-ended by a girl barely out of her teens. I got out of my car and went to get her insurance details, only for her mother to get out and up in my face, screaming at me to, "Get back in your fucking car and get the fuck out of here!" I panicked and did just that. FML

#18091969
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13362) - you deserved it (33255)

On 10/27/2011 at 9:22pm - misc - by Benjamin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was napping. I woke up to my pillow making some sounds. Thinking it was my head shifting my pillow, I went back to sleep. Later on I woke up to the sounds again, and a mouse staring at my face. FML

#18070183
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27928) - you deserved it (3049)

On 10/25/2011 at 3:17am - animals - by pinkjade - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML

#18039986
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16933) - you deserved it (30724)

On 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

#17981925
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27872) - you deserved it (2152)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by francesa_loca - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at work as a cashier. An old lady unbagged everything I had, and angrily "taught" me how to bag. She put potatoes on her eggs and broke them. She then screamed that I was useless and retarded in front of all my other customers and manager. FML

#17925630
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32562) - you deserved it (1962)

On 10/07/2011 at 1:55am - work - by bdjsbskl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was suspended from work. Some lady went to the manager and told them that I was stalking her, all because I would kindly greet her everyday at the grocery store. I'm the cashier. FML

#17921774
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24465) - you deserved it (1800)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:28pm - work - by hazlanz216 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#17786213
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (4659)

On 09/20/2011 at 3:24am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

#17775098
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22193) - you deserved it (3092)

On 09/18/2011 at 8:23pm - love - by DeadScared (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my family came to see me in my first acting role in Romeo and Juliet. It all went reasonably well for the first half hour or so, after which my seemingly shitfaced aunt started heckling and saying "that's what she said" after every line, before eventually being thrown out by security. FML

#17760005
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24129) - you deserved it (2063)

On 09/16/2011 at 8:25pm - work - by Mandy (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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