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FMLs submitted from Arkansas

Today, I was invited out to a date by my ex-boyfriend. He seemed really excited to reconnect and kept holding my hand and complimenting how I looked. Out of nowhere a girl runs up to him screaming. It was his current girlfriend, he was using me to make her jealous. FML

#2983603
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48723) - you deserved it (6206)

On 06/18/2009 at 12:52am - love - by savvylady (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was helping my church clean up a park. I was given a sledgehammer and told to break up a concrete picnic table so we could haul it off. About half way through I swung the sledgehammer REALLY hard, completely missed the table, and hit myself in the shin. FML

#2777163
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55621) - you deserved it (22175)

On 06/10/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by rubmytummy (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I went to a barbecue and noticed a girl that I had be interested in. When I walked up to ask how she was doing I noticed she had some BBQ sauce on her face. Jokingly I licked my thumb and reach to remove it. It turned out to be a scab from a pimple she had popped earlier. FML

#2431161
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16570) - you deserved it (53999)

On 05/30/2009 at 12:19pm - misc - by eayers2689 (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at work as a cashier, I had a male customer come up to me and ask me what hours I worked today, like he has done for several weeks now. Immediately after, my manager calls my lane to tell me to watch out for that guy. He has been stalking a co-worker of mine. Apparently, I'm next. FML

#2393503
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44558) - you deserved it (3829)

On 05/28/2009 at 11:51pm - work - by be_nj (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, two of my cousins sat me down and said they wanted to give me an early Birthday present. With straight faces, they look at me and say: "we signed you up for eHarmony, and paid for 12 months." Not only do my cousins think I need help finding a boyfriend, but they think it take a year. FML

#2051394
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50454) - you deserved it (5507)

On 05/18/2009 at 4:43pm - love - by imnotTHATlonely (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my friends and I spent hours on the Disney website playing in Pixie Hollow. We made our own fairies and flew around completing tasks for TinkerBell and her fairy friends. We're in college, and this is how we spent our Saturday night. FML

#1347981
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27049) - you deserved it (61065)

On 04/26/2009 at 4:44am - misc - by panicromanceX3 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was fired from my job of 5 years. I was let go because I couldn't take the company to 'the next level'. My now ex-boss asked me if I could process my severance check because he didn't know how. I had to write myself my last paycheck. FML

#1315849
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55236) - you deserved it (2582)

On 04/25/2009 at 9:31am - work - by feistychick (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I found out that the girl I've been in love with for a long while got back together with her ex boyfriend because he had confessed his true feelings to her through a note in her locker. It was my note. FML

#1120494
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (109649) - you deserved it (10796)

On 04/19/2009 at 3:21pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I met a guy online. We talked all night long and hit it off amazingly. He told me he'd never felt that way about anyone else, and I agreed. He sent me a picture and he was gorgeous. I sent him one after he assured me he didn't care what I looked like. I haven't heard from him since. FML

#867066
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67858) - you deserved it (11251)

On 04/08/2009 at 3:19am - love - by DL06 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, after taping 5-year-olds do a skit at an improv camp, I used the camera's view-finder to zoom in on a female co-worker's chest. Another female co-worker tapped me on the shoulder to show that the TV was still connected to the camera. Parents, kids, and instructors all witnessed it. FML

#310419
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15059) - you deserved it (131588)

On 03/13/2009 at 9:06pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was picking up my daughter from my ex-husband's house and his new girlfriend was there. I called to my daughter that it was time to leave and she clung to his girlfriend and said 'Mommy, I don't want to leave.' She wasn't talking to me. FML

#234756
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (144771) - you deserved it (9852)

On 03/07/2009 at 3:15pm - kids - by divorced (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I walked into my house to find everyone sitting around the table and looking sad. I thought it would be a good time to crack a joke and said "What's wrong? Grandma finally die?" Turns out she had. FML

#217290
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27456) - you deserved it (137455)

On 03/05/2009 at 2:33pm - health - by ubbernoob (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was hanging out with a couple of friends and one of them tells a funny story about how he filled a condom with syrup and put it in his friend's mouth while he was asleep. Me with my big mouth starts to say, "Condoms taste na--" and stopped myself as everyone started laughing at me. FML

#1302
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6695) - you deserved it (25295)

On 01/15/2009 at 7:39pm - misc - by jen - United States (Arkansas)



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