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FMLs submitted from Arizona

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48691) - you deserved it (16003)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my dad what his plans for Friday were. Apparently, he's going to a concert with my step-mom all evening. It's been their plan for months. Friday is my birthday. That's been set since the day I was born. FML

#15099453
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33171) - you deserved it (6557)

On 02/24/2011 at 5:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I spent my remaining cash on a doctor's visit, only to find out that at the age of 22, I'm getting major health problems brought on by stress. I came home to relax, only to find out my roommate can't pay his rent, and needs me to cover for him so we don't get evicted. FML

#15090648
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29764) - you deserved it (2557)

On 02/23/2011 at 1:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

#15045692
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10110) - you deserved it (76149)

On 02/19/2011 at 9:03pm - misc - by breakinphones - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out my husband is sleeping with my best friend. The best part? We all just signed a 12 month essentially non-breakable lease on a house together. FML

#14874004
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38345) - you deserved it (4752)

On 02/06/2011 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by cllutz (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52315) - you deserved it (3841)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

#14847630
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49765) - you deserved it (3915)

On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML

#14780343
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22904) - you deserved it (35036)

On 01/30/2011 at 10:13pm - love - by gotnogame (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my best friend came over for dinner and a movie. Moments after arriving, she spent an hour on the phone, and ended up accepting another invitation before leaving. I guess it's dinner for one tonight. FML

#14686261
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25246) - you deserved it (2300)

On 01/23/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML

#14634381
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9897) - you deserved it (31063)

On 01/19/2011 at 12:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, we got a speeding ticket in the mail with my drunk daughter's picture on it. She was waving at the camera. FML

#14584296
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28340) - you deserved it (5011)

On 01/15/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while changing my clothes, my 3 year old daughter informed me that I looked like a zebra. Noticing my shocked face, she tried comforting me by telling me I was a pretty zebra because I was a purple zebra. She was talking about my stretch marks. FML

#14451100
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32914) - you deserved it (4299)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:56pm - kids - by jenabp - United States (Arizona)

Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML

#14261370
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26936) - you deserved it (6735)

On 12/19/2010 at 3:51pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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