Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Arizona

Today, I was stuck at the airport overnight waiting for my flight for about 5 hours. I then went and looked at the departures board. It said that my flight had already departed. FML

#16116950
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25645) - you deserved it (18214)

On 05/10/2011 at 12:08pm - misc - by Phantommajik - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML

#15817034
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42287) - you deserved it (8247)

On 04/17/2011 at 1:56am - intimacy - by rastafarimon (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I made a video for a school tour of my apartment in German. The walls in my apartment are thin, so you could hear my sister having phone sex in her room in the background. FML

#15804053
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30444) - you deserved it (5172)

On 04/16/2011 at 3:04am - intimacy - by Xanadu (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was giving a strip tease over Skype to my boyfriend. My mom walked in mid-way through, took a long look at me, said hi to my boyfriend, and walked out. FML

#15606903
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15621) - you deserved it (44889)

On 04/02/2011 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by lovely321 (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46002) - you deserved it (15393)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I asked my dad what his plans for Friday were. Apparently, he's going to a concert with my step-mom all evening. It's been their plan for months. Friday is my birthday. That's been set since the day I was born. FML

#15099453
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31496) - you deserved it (6396)

On 02/24/2011 at 5:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I spent my remaining cash on a doctor's visit, only to find out that at the age of 22, I'm getting major health problems brought on by stress. I came home to relax, only to find out my roommate can't pay his rent, and needs me to cover for him so we don't get evicted. FML

#15090648
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27021) - you deserved it (2344)

On 02/23/2011 at 1:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I threw my brand new iPhone 4 in the air whilst laying on my bed. It came down, went through my fingers, landed on my balls, then broke on the concrete floor. FML

#15045692
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9504) - you deserved it (73758)

On 02/19/2011 at 9:03pm - misc - by breakinphones - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out my husband is sleeping with my best friend. The best part? We all just signed a 12 month essentially non-breakable lease on a house together. FML

#14874004
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35677) - you deserved it (4467)

On 02/06/2011 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by cllutz (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50235) - you deserved it (3746)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out my dad ate my pet rabbit two years ago. He said he ran away. FML

#14847630
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46916) - you deserved it (3695)

On 02/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went out with a girl I like. After a movie, we went to McDonald's. There was this couple making out. The girl I was with remarked about how lame it would be to go to McDonald's on a date. I thought we were on a date. FML

#14780343
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21505) - you deserved it (33116)

On 01/30/2011 at 10:13pm - love - by gotnogame (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my best friend came over for dinner and a movie. Moments after arriving, she spent an hour on the phone, and ended up accepting another invitation before leaving. I guess it's dinner for one tonight. FML

#14686261
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23818) - you deserved it (2180)

On 01/23/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (Arizona)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: