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FMLs submitted from Alberta

Today, I discovered that my new roommate likes to take the loose hair when she showers and make shapes with it on the shower wall. She calls it art. FML

#13642411
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26731) - you deserved it (3211)

On 10/29/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was showering at hockey practice. It would have been business as usual, if not for one of my teammates playing with his junk and not-so-subtly asked me to connect. There are 5 more months of hockey. FML

#13615368
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24434) - you deserved it (2691)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by thjeltz - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boss walked up and smacked my butt. I am a 19 year old guy. My boss is a 50 year old woman. I desperately need this job. FML

#13537092
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32906) - you deserved it (3521)

On 10/21/2010 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was walking to school. I started running to catch up with my friend. I yelled her name, and she turned around in time to watch me slip on a sheet of ice, fall face first, and pass out. When she ran to my side, I unconsciously peed on her. FML

#13471271
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28067) - you deserved it (3754)

On 10/16/2010 at 11:18am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my ex-girlfriend was having lunch with my parents. Believing she was in love with me and feeling the same, I dropped by. My parents told me that she’s their friend and that she has a boyfriend that they approve of, all while telling me I was never good enough for her. FML

#13318018
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32192) - you deserved it (4362)

On 10/04/2010 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I am now in charge of driving my friends home after they had an awesome night. FML

#13081151
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23873) - you deserved it (8680)

On 09/17/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by happy bday - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I procrastinated on doing my on-line training for my new job. Thinking it would only take a few hours to complete, I started it in the early evening. It is now almost 4 am, and I start my new job in 3 hours. There is still about another hour and a half on on-line training left. FML

#13032045
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6930) - you deserved it (46475)

On 09/13/2010 at 5:40am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML

#12826740
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11121) - you deserved it (46479)

On 08/30/2010 at 8:04pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was moving out of my old place. While walking around to make sure I would get my damage deposit back, I stepped on my roommate's lipstick and smeared it all over the white carpet. Then, I tripped on the phone cord and ripped the whole thing out of the wall. FML

#12823670
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30959) - you deserved it (7651)

On 08/30/2010 at 4:10pm - misc - by tikizombie (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, he asked which girl I'd found out about. FML

#12630401
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (3318)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:11pm - love - by Sara246 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I gave blood. He sneezed while he stuck the needle in my arm. FML

#12612663
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36141) - you deserved it (2617)

On 08/18/2010 at 9:26pm - health - by gorey - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after saving up my money for weeks, I went to see my favorite artist in concert with my friends. Two songs in, I passed out, hit my head, and had to have someone drive me home. FML

#12456639
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27110) - you deserved it (6855)

On 08/11/2010 at 3:19pm - health - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad found and read my diary. Most of the entries were about how my father didn't respect my privacy. Then he phoned my aunt and read her passages from it. FML

#10994237
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36721) - you deserved it (3510)

On 06/05/2010 at 7:49pm - misc - by ugh (woman) - Canada (Alberta)



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