Today, I learned that my girlfriend is cheating on me when she was arrested for having sex in public. Not with me though. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34241) - you deserved it (2299)
On 07/19/2011 at 3:40am - intimacy - by ken - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I have horrible morning sickness. I was helping my daughter fingerpaint, when suddenly the smell of the paint set my stomach off. I threw up all over myself and her painting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22180) - you deserved it (2809)
On 07/18/2011 at 12:22pm - health - by deeenalynn - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was standing at airport security. One of the bag inspectors asked me to remove my travel pouch, pointing to the lump under my shirt. I didn't know how to tell him that it was just one of my fat rolls. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24595) - you deserved it (9586)
On 07/10/2011 at 10:34pm - health - by muffintop (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36290) - you deserved it (5824)
On 07/07/2011 at 8:19am - misc - by Snurkles (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I jokingly told my girlfriend that sperm kills acne, she laughed and said "so that's how you got rid of yours so fast" then continued to text all her friends and tell them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11186) - you deserved it (32008)
On 07/03/2011 at 1:51am - intimacy - by fmylife7721 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend informed me that he'd resolved all the issues with his ex and is getting back together with her. Normally I could tolerate this if it weren't for the fact that I just moved to a different country to live with him, and turned down a university and a scholarship. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27022) - you deserved it (40137)
On 06/28/2011 at 5:53am - love - by Mrs.Slyfox (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29472) - you deserved it (3454)
On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I found out my wife isn't cheating. She says she's just getting older and sex isn't important anymore. She's 27. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36499) - you deserved it (3495)
On 06/20/2011 at 3:43am - intimacy - by wtf - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I learned that if I don't give my mom attention immediately after she calls my name, she will throw a baseball at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25049) - you deserved it (7987)
On 06/04/2011 at 9:10pm - misc - by wooowmom (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend and I were driving to a costume party. On the way, we got into an argument and she kicked me out of her car. I had to walk around the city center in an Iron Man outfit trying to find the party venue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22370) - you deserved it (6851)
On 06/01/2011 at 1:43am - misc - by 2ndplacechamp - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend in a crowded mall. I thought this was a good idea, until she went ballistic, began screaming and crying, and then stabbed me in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. I got banned from the mall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17591) - you deserved it (35769)
On 05/30/2011 at 12:29am - love - by kingpin9219 - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I went to hand in a resume. The secretary happened to be a girl I liked in high school. When leaving, I shook hands with the employer, waved goodbye to the girl, turned around and walked straight into a glass wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25210) - you deserved it (4483)
On 05/26/2011 at 2:00am - work - by Fred (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my husband told me that he's letting his mother move in with us. He told her it was alright without even consulting me first. I hate my mother in law so much that I'm contemplating divorce rather than living with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35309) - you deserved it (5892)
On 05/04/2011 at 1:41am - misc - by kayt240 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 20 May 2013
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