Intimacy and Transportation: Today, I experienced the old joke about recognising women by... - FML

By Anonymous - 30/03/2018 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I experienced the old joke about recognising women by their shoes sticking out of the driver and passenger windows. It was my mother's shoes in my mother's car, but the guy happily plowing her on top of the hand-brake was not my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 598

You deserved it 314

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

DraftHail614 17

Friday 30 March 2018 5:06

The idea of commitment is just gone at this point. Let your dad know. He doesn't deserve that kind of bs.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 30 March 2018 5:13

Plowed on top of the hand-brake? She’s gonna be sore tomorrow, and not just in the fun muffin!

Comments

DraftHail614 17

Friday 30 March 2018 5:06

The idea of commitment is just gone at this point. Let your dad know. He doesn't deserve that kind of bs.

QueenAfrodite 8

Friday 27 July 2018 19:52

Lol dude it could be an open marriage. Dad could totally be aware lol. Time to stop being a child and understand that relationships have many different dynamics. Not everyone is in a monogamous marriage.

DraftHail614 17

Friday 27 July 2018 20:03

Ah yes. Finding an excuse to sleep around are we? Bud, it isn't childish to think that most relationships are like that. Also, you'd think that that'd be something to mention to OP. Want to have multiple partners? Cool. I mean polyamory is just a label to use so you have an excuse to have multiple partners without being called a hoe. But yes. I'm most definitely the child.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 30 March 2018 5:13

Plowed on top of the hand-brake? She’s gonna be sore tomorrow, and not just in the fun muffin!

Suzi_d16 27

Saturday 22 May 2021 1:26

Haha fun muffin. Love it.

CrazyTrainWreck 19

Friday 30 March 2018 7:35

Were they at least wearing a seatbelt? Got to be safe no matter what activity you do in your vehicle.

Donut_Wizard 23

Friday 30 March 2018 8:08

Who else, but Quagmire?

Lobby_Bee 17

Friday 30 March 2018 14:45

His penis must be really small and needed to use the handbrake as a "toy".

kazekai8 11

Friday 30 March 2018 21:27

: /

TyePie 6

Thursday 5 April 2018 11:12

Maybe she was just helping out with making one of those Fake Taxi videos.

QueenAfrodite 8

Friday 27 July 2018 19:51

Lol. Maybe they have an open marriage and didn’t tell you. Lmmfao. Go Mom!!!!!! Haaaaaaaaaa

Keywords

Kids Music Names Work Customers Coworkers Bodyshaming Awkward Landlords Roommate Money Parents Allergies AITA Dogs Singing Cute Neighbours Embarrassing Ironic Health Accident Cats Animals Airport Love Intimacy Sex Cheating Relationship advice

The Top

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 943

You deserved it 251 934

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 608

You deserved it 5 759

The Top

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 950

You deserved it 2 669

Today, I paid $80 to change my cell number because my ex-girlfriend had been stalking me. To inform all of my friends of the change, I sent a mass text message to everyone in my phonebook. Including my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 759

You deserved it 83 117

Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 446

You deserved it 3 110

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defense lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one is going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 369

You deserved it 4 848

Today, and in the past week since became a full-time dad to my 16 year-old son, he's got caught sneaking out at night, lost his virginity, and I had to call the cops because he was caught trying to go two states over to be with said girl. I think he's trying to make me look bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 199

You deserved it 321

Today, I was in the park making out with a guy I’m seeing when I heard a familiar voice say, “Abby?” It was the guy who was trying to get with me for months but I told him I wasn’t ready for a relationship, rather than tell him that he was too ugly for me. If looks could kill… FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 932