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Only FMLs I didn't vote on | All the FMLs

Today, my dog ate my little brothers medication. I spent all morning trying to make him throw it up, but it wasn't working so I took him to the animal hospital, which was in a different city. $150 in poison control and vet bills later, I found the pill we thought he ate stuck under his paw. FML

#3356894
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36821) - you deserved it (7338)

On 06/30/2009 at 2:07am - animals - by glowstick (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my kittens hunted and killed their first prey. My hamster. FML

#20981341
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43540) - you deserved it (7081) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/05/2013 at 1:52am - animals - by Chatons - Switzerland

Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML

#20026951
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12116) - you deserved it (22498)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

#15251582
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40486) - you deserved it (4382)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized I have more dogs than I do friends. I have two dogs. FML

#16126414
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35363) - you deserved it (6146)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML

#1687586
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13477) - you deserved it (56245)

On 05/06/2009 at 10:07am - animals - by pissedoffandon (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML

#7156586
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21305) - you deserved it (8100)

On 01/05/2010 at 12:15am - animals - by bels12 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

#20026086
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24238) - you deserved it (1594)

On 08/17/2012 at 7:26am - animals - by byegeorge (woman) - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, my dog was scooped up by an owl. FML

#17115448
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54538) - you deserved it (9314)

On 07/15/2011 at 12:24am - animals - by flipnazn - United States (Texas)

Today, while he was eating chicken, one of my friends asked me why I'm a vegetarian. I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals are forced to live in. He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals, they're birds." FML

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. In his front room was a giant parrot. Hoping to impress them, I went over to the bird and began talking to it proving I wasn't scared. Out of nowhere, it's beak clenched onto my nose making it gush blood on the carpet. I was hospitalized. FML

#454917
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53440) - you deserved it (17430)

On 03/18/2009 at 10:57pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fish's tank was all green and nasty, but I had no time to clean it because I woke up late, so the job was left to my mom. When I came back, the water level seemed high, and the fish looked a little strange, so I asked my mom what she did. She said "I cleaned the tank with chlorine!" FML

#404530
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44537) - you deserved it (27893)

On 03/17/2009 at 12:34am - animals - by Poorfish (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was teasing my cat with a piece of string when suddenly my phone rang. I answered it with one hand and put the string down with the other onto my lap. The beast seized the opportunity to spring, claws out, onto my privates. FML

#305
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22574) - you deserved it (12578)

On 11/14/2008 at 10:27pm - animals - by dooommage - Sent from mobile version

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

#1815627
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (419676) - you deserved it (59656)

On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)

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