Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, while getting out of Starbucks there was a homeless guy. I bought him a coffee and he was so happy he gave me a hug. Guess whose wallet is missing? FML

#12674588
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33828) - you deserved it (12411)

On 08/22/2010 at 12:27am - money - by coffee - United States (Florida)

Today, after a costly fix for my brakes that failed a while back as I was going down a hill, I found a $130 bill in the mail attached to a speed camera photo of me shitting myself. FML

#12657021
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26035) - you deserved it (3550)

On 08/21/2010 at 1:25am - money - by car (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after already having a terrible day, I went to Starbucks for an espresso. Being nice, I put the last dollar I had in my wallet in their tip jar. While paying for my drink, my card was denied for insufficient funds. The world hates me. FML

#12542029
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28023) - you deserved it (5603)

On 08/15/2010 at 4:20pm - money - by noespresso (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on the way to traffic court for a $340 speeding ticket I'd got. My mother called me and I wasn't paying attention which caused me to speed. Right past a cop. When I told the cop where I was going, he started laughing at me. I now have another $300 ticket. FML

#12497360
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8786) - you deserved it (45323)

On 08/13/2010 at 10:16am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband fell for an online scam leaving us 1450.00 in the negative. We get paid tomorrow and most of our money is going to cover that debt. FML

#12489960
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29275) - you deserved it (7198)

On 08/13/2010 at 12:03am - money - by Relevance - United States

Today, I received a new debit card, so I cut the old one into pieces. I then picked up my remaining card, and realized I'd cut up the wrong one. FML

#12327925
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9657) - you deserved it (48778)

On 08/05/2010 at 7:14am - money - by 8to10days (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I had to admit to everyone, including my cable guy, that I'm moving back in with my parents. FML

#12313320
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20677) - you deserved it (8746)

On 08/04/2010 at 5:08pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I discovered our AOL billing information. Turns out we've been paying for dial-up via automatic bill paying that we thought we cancelled in 2000. $1,800 later, we called to cancel. Customer service congratulated us on being loyal members for over 13 years. FML

#12266156
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17395) - you deserved it (26570)

On 08/02/2010 at 1:23pm - money - by Jay (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I threw a party at my girlfriend's house before her parents came home from vacation. After the party, I found all of her mom's favorite wine glasses broken. I spent $500 on new glasses, and wrote a huge apology for the party and the damage. She got home and told me that they were already broken. FML

#12198220
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13489) - you deserved it (33298)

On 07/30/2010 at 12:26am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought my girlfriend an expensive chihuahua puppy because she was never allowed to have one as a kid. She was so excited and happy so she leaned in to give it a kiss. It bit her in the face, she had to get stitches, and they put the $500 dog to sleep. FML

#12192420
341 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35598) - you deserved it (7005)

On 07/29/2010 at 7:13pm - money - by Joseph (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at work, I was talking to a customer. She kept shaking her head "no" at everything I said. I asked what she was disagreeing with. She told me she has Parkinson's Disease, teared up, and asked to speak to my manager. FML

#12165853
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32581) - you deserved it (6680)

On 07/28/2010 at 1:38pm - money - by RWW (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I didn't realize until I was home that I'd thrown my retainer away with my tray at Chick-fil-A. FML

#12149322
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12929) - you deserved it (26239)

On 07/27/2010 at 6:15pm - money - by idgit42 (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, someone gave me 13 dollar bills. I rejected one because I'm very superstitious about the unlucky 13. Later, I waited half an hour in the car for someone to bring me exactly 1 dollar because I did not have enough for the parking fee. FML

#12088821
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6652) - you deserved it (57843)

On 07/24/2010 at 5:56pm - money - by onedollar (man) - Venezuela (Distrito Federal)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: