Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I accidentally adopted a dolphin for $125. FML

#19566058
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10745) - you deserved it (26814)

On 05/02/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Optimus_Prime97 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when an aging lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she had pickpocketed me of my wallet. FML

#19539590
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26252) - you deserved it (2116)

On 04/27/2012 at 9:55pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I called my mobile phone provider to end my contract. A sales rep spent over half an hour trying to convince me to reconsider, and I kept refusing. I ended up breaking down and accepting a "more economical" contract, which I didn't notice costs almost twice as much as the last one. FML

#19503587
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7114) - you deserved it (32301)

On 04/20/2012 at 10:49pm - money - by ... (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

#19494291
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25064) - you deserved it (2396)

On 04/19/2012 at 2:24am - money - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML

#19467160
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20948) - you deserved it (1789)

On 04/14/2012 at 3:27pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got mugged at Disney World, the happiest place on Earth. FML

#19434352
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33480) - you deserved it (3078)

On 04/09/2012 at 1:15am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a new deli in town. While waiting in line, I hadn't made up my mind on what to order, so I let the guy behind me go instead. Turns out he was the hundredth customer, and they gave him his lunch for free. FML

#19429984
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29561) - you deserved it (8448)

On 04/08/2012 at 1:18pm - money - by kirsty - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I called an airline's customer service line. Apparently the way that they deal with uncommon problems is by having someone put you on hold for twenty minutes, answer and yell something unintelligible at you, put you back on hold, and repeat. This went on for over an hour. FML

#19397003
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17136) - you deserved it (1718)

On 04/02/2012 at 7:40pm - money - by unfriendlyskies (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that all the things I've lent to my best friend over the last few years that have never been returned were actually pawned off so she could pay her cable bill. FML

#19395452
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22431) - you deserved it (2814)

On 04/02/2012 at 2:44pm - money - by Kelly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received a coupon for a special offer including flights and accommodation for the honeymoon destination that my fiancé and I are keen on. Yesterday, I paid the full price for the flight tickets and hotel deposit for the honeymoon. FML

#19362332
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21140) - you deserved it (2157)

On 03/28/2012 at 6:47am - money - by honeymooner (man) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I paid top dollar for an Italian soda that ended up consisting almost entirely of ice. When I complained, the girl insisted that the soda water stopped the ice from melting. She said she didn't see what the problem was, and threatened to have me thrown out if I didn't "simmer down." FML

#19352792
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17532) - you deserved it (4567)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:33pm - money - by Sharkie49 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received my first payment of child support from my estranged husband: $50 and a note that said he wouldn't be paying any more. FML

#19335600
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21481) - you deserved it (3213)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found a $10 bill on the ground. I got so excited and felt like I was the richest person alive. That was, until the wind blew it out of my hand, never to be seen again. FML

#19321063
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22749) - you deserved it (7017)

On 03/21/2012 at 4:13pm - money - by MoneyMoneyMoneyMonayMONAY (woman) - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: