Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML

by Anonymous / 08/24/2014 at 4:45pm / United States (Washington) / Money

Today, my 24-year-old, unemployed brother stole all of my food money and went out with his friends. His punishment from our parents? He has to pay me back when he gets a job. My stomach has to wait. FML

by HungryStudent / 08/20/2014 at 2:59pm / Puerto Rico / Money

Today, my car got towed. My money is in my car and they won't let me open my car to get money until my car is "released". FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2014 at 12:30am / United States (Maryland) / Money

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

by thoughthewasjoking / 08/15/2014 at 5:10pm / United States (Alabama) / Money

Today, I managed to get a €5 note tangled in the zip on my purse. I couldn't open it without ripping it to shreds. FML

by MoMoneyMoProblems / 08/07/2014 at 4:23am / Ireland (Dublin) / Money

Today, my neighbour casually mentioned that he sold my car's GPS that I'd let him borrow. He figured I wouldn't be needing it anymore since I lost my license. FML

by lovethyneighbour / 08/03/2014 at 8:19pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Money

Today, I spent my afternoon rummaging through old jeans and other pants, due to being broke and needing cash for ramen. FML

by baconistasty27 / 08/01/2014 at 1:33am / United States (California) / Money

Today, the city shut off our water, because they said we didn't pay the bill. Turns out, it was sitting on their desk the whole time. I guess sending someone out to turn off our water was easier than checking to see if we'd actually paid the bill. FML

by fedUPwithPEOPLE / 07/31/2014 at 3:35am / United States (Alabama) / Money

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

by ChristinePi / 07/26/2014 at 6:09pm / United States (New York) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was helping out at my church. At lunchtime, a really cute guy my age walked over and told me I was pretty. I was flattered, until I turned around and saw his annoyed buddies handing him several dollar bills. FML

by what people do for money / 07/18/2014 at 12:45pm / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML

by library book / 07/10/2014 at 1:27am / United States (Texas) / Money

Today, I hit rock bottom; I watched one of those shitty infomercial channels, without even being forced into it at gunpoint. Even worse is that I practically creamed myself over a damn fruit juicer, all because it was 50% off and I could actually afford it. FML

by The Rock's arse / 07/04/2014 at 4:29pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Money

Today, I used the self-checkout for the first time. I didn't see a slot for bills, so I tried to put them in the coin slot for a solid three minutes. There was a huge line behind me, silently judging. FML

by notacashier / 07/03/2014 at 8:29am / United States (New York) / Money