Work: Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's...

By Anonymous - 13/06/2009 19:47 - United States

Today, I gave a carpet shampooing demonstration in a stranger's home. To my surprise, the white expensive carpet was dyed grey due to something in the solution. The owner held me hostage in her house by barracading the door until my manager got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 552

You deserved it 9 083

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By JB - 07/12/2011 14:29 - United States

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 011

You deserved it 28 736

By carpetoops - 21/06/2009 16:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I spilt purple washing detergent all over my white carpet. Desperate to get it up I grabbed a blue towel and started mopping it up. The detergent hasn't stained the carpet at all, the blue dye from the towel has. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 835

You deserved it 35 544

By gypsy - 24/06/2011 02:00 - Australia

Today, I hired a cleaner to clean my apartment so when my in-laws visited tonight, they wouldn't think I was lazy. I got home from work, the cleaner hadn't shown at all, and my in-laws had arrived early. My mother-in-law is now mopping the floors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 280

You deserved it 37 733

Creepy and spooky

By Dino - 12/10/2012 06:36 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my new roommate showed me to my room, which I got a good deal on. I noticed a big black spot on the floor in the walk-in closet. When I asked, he said his last roommate committed suicide and he didn't want to pay to have the carpets professionally cleaned, hence the "good deal." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 737

You deserved it 2 365

By Danielle - 09/04/2011 23:00 - United States

Today, while dog sitting, the dog peed on the carpet. There was a bottle of cleaning spray on the counter so I sprayed the spot. Turns out that spray was Clorox Bleach. Now their carpet is bright orange. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 322

You deserved it 27 362

By kebaby - 19/06/2010 23:19 - United States

Today, I spent a long time steam-cleaning a mystery stain on my living room carpet. I turned the light on to get a better look at it, and realized that it was a shadow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 936

You deserved it 48 177

Welcome back!

By Terry - 21/02/2023 08:00 - United States - Tampa

Today, my girlfriend works for a company that cleans VRBOs, so while she went to see family for a week, I asked her coworkers to come clean while she was gone, even the owner of the company showed up, They deep-cleaned house, but when she got home I got yelled at for a dirty coffee mug on my desk. The coffee was still warm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 072

You deserved it 116

Deadly cocktail

By blame the maid - 13/09/2020 17:02 - United States

Today, my very sheltered girlfriend decided to surprise me by cleaning our apartment. Although she grew up with housekeepers and maids, I thought it was common knowledge that you don’t try cleaning the bathroom with both bleach and ammonia. We still can’t go back inside our place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 150

Don't let the bedbugs bite!

By sleepingonthetoilet - 28/03/2018 08:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, my supervisor locked me in the women's bathroom as I was cleaning it. I heard the owner scolding him, so I waited for the door to open, thinking he got in trouble. It wasn't until I heard the front gate locking that I realized I'm staying the night in the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 508

You deserved it 388

Silly idiot

By Heather - 04/03/2010 12:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I was quite happily glossing my new bathroom door, when my useless, alcoholic, housemate came rolling in, knocked the paint over, stood in it, and without realising, walked it all the way down the stairs. I had just had a brand new carpet fitted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 238

You deserved it 3 683

manoverboard 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Well, if it was THAT expensive, they shouldn't have taken the chance. I said it's their fault.

SadinSherman 16

Monday 3 October 2011 18:44

A job is a job

Comments

swordknight 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:57

FYL, barracading is just over the top.

kyleinsane 0

Wednesday 19 May 2010 5:43

move the shit, tea bag the lady, take a shit on the carpet, and walk out

friedpwnadge 25

Sunday 16 February 2014 18:49

False imprisonment, anyone?

Fmylifffeee 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:58

creepy...

imajinethat 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:58

YDI for being one of those lame door-to-door vacuum salesmen.

SadinSherman 16

Monday 3 October 2011 18:44

A job is a job

jskains 6

Saturday 13 June 2009 23:59

That is also very illegal. (2nd? How old are you? 5?)

cucuto89 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Cool Story Bro

manoverboard 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Well, if it was THAT expensive, they shouldn't have taken the chance. I said it's their fault.

falcon_paunch 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:04

Err.. I don't think the owner can do that... D:

albinorhino 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:06

Cheap vaccum

Hustlinpimp 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:08

wow, ur a guy and the female owner of the house kept you hostage? man up next time ya sissy

AshleyRose784 0

Sunday 14 June 2009 0:10

You should have called the cops, she can't do that

DinoRawwr 0

Tuesday 20 July 2010 22:33

OP, get a better job, and maybe you won't have this problem =]

Keywords

Love Music Cute Coworkers Work Gross TMI Racism Scary Customers Kids Geek Gamers Technology Miscellaneous Neighbours Relatable DIY Social Media Ironic Cheating Sex Awkward Animals Health Insects Insurance Money Plumbing Embarrassing

The Top

Today, the homewrecker who stole my boyfriend had the audacity to text me that I have to pay her medical bills from the pounding I gave her when I caught her and my boyfriend red-handed. She doesn’t care that I will now be a single mom of two kids and my only source of income is gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 922

Today, I was going out with my supermodel-gorgeous friend, so I put extra effort into looking good. I thought I looked pretty good, but when we got to the subway station, a drunk old man looked at us and loudly announced, "That's always the way it is, there's a fit one and an ugly one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 150

You deserved it 3 437

The Top

Today, my roommate revealed that she's dating my ex. I later had to navigate around them caressing each other just to grab my noodles from the microwave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 814

You deserved it 293

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 951

You deserved it 2 689

Today, I walked in on my brother completely naked from the waist down. I wouldn't have cared if he wasn't masturbating using my lingerie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 003

You deserved it 1 070

Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 313

You deserved it 38 067

Today, I reassured everyone at work that the mark on my lip was just a pimple, not a cold sore. It's actually neither. I, a 21-year-old young woman, slipped while shaving my moustache and sliced off part of my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 901

You deserved it 627

Today, I took my mum on the London Underground. We were standing on the platform, when she suddenly bought up a load of phlegm in her mouth. Instead of trying to find a bin, she just full on spat out the biggest green pile on the floor next to people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 799

You deserved it 133

Same thing different taste

Creepy and spooky

Welcome back!

Deadly cocktail

Don't let the bedbugs bite!

Silly idiot

Top comments

Comments