By Anonymous - 04/11/2017 05:00

Spicy
Today, while making deliveries, a lady answered the door stark naked and invited me in. I'm a young single guy so I went for it, but her husband was also there, ready to go with an enormous boner, so I ran to my van and went back to the depot. They reported me for bad customer service. FML
I agree, your life sucks 6 870
You deserved it 2 772

Same thing different taste

Top comments

That's how murders happen. Never enter a stranger's house, and if they ask why or threaten to complain, tell them it's against company policy.

That's what you get when you play on the company clock.

Comments

That's how murders happen. Never enter a stranger's house, and if they ask why or threaten to complain, tell them it's against company policy.

You've been watching too many movies. Murders are almost always done by someone who actually knows and therefore feels they have a reason to kill the victim. It's extremely rare that someone will decide to kill a total stranger for funsies.

Err, I was specifically referring to the cases where the murderer and victim don't have a prior relationship. The majority of the time, rises like this ARE used as the bait to draw the victim out of the public eye. It's also the common setup for sexual assaults and batteries, when the victim and attacker don't know each other.

Investigation Discovery’s “A Stranger in My Home.” Eek.

That's what you get when you play on the company clock.

****, that wasn't meant to be a reply. Goddamnit, now I look like a ********.

Donut_Wizard 23

When they said to follow your head, that isn't what they meant.

I will never understand how people can have sex with someone they literally made eye contact with two seconds prior. Saying, "They're two consenting adults", or "As long as they used protection" is getting old. It's none of my business and I know it happens every day, but damn! It is something I could never see myself doing out of fear and disgust.

Contraception and abortions are very recent inventions, so the now obsolete taboo against casual sex is still very much alive.

Something tells me those disliking your comment missed your sarcasm disguised as a serious comment, Dave.

EmDizzle2007 28

congratulations. you have self respect and common sense.

You might have made the right call if they wanted you to receive the package instead of delivering yours.

You’re lucky your bones weren’t made into wind chimes.

chessu 21

I mean, as much as I get the temptation, surely you must realise **** isn't real life?

tounces7 27

I'm not entirely sure that having the husband there was well makes this any less of a "****-like" scenario.

EnvyMe33 26

Are you sure this wasn’t a dream from watching too many pornos?!?

Both parties are at fault here. She shouldn't have answered the door naked or invited you in (why would she do that with her husband there? Guess she wanted a threesome?), and you shouldn't have accepted the offer since you were on the clock.

Notmymonkeysnotmycircus 16

Hey you’re supposed to deliver service with a smile!