Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Man or woman?

Today, it's my birthday. My ex just sent me a text. I read it, happy he had remembered. He wanted me to know he has a new girlfriend. FML

#578
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18682) - you deserved it (1725)

On 12/23/2008 at 2:43am - misc - by Plume - Sent from mobile version

Today, I wore myself out cooking, preparing tasty little dishes for my sweetheart. I heard him arrive and shout as he went up the stairs, "It stinks of shit in here! Have you been cooking?" I threw everything in the bin. We can eat sandwiches. FML

#577
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23846) - you deserved it (2968)

On 12/23/2008 at 1:47am - misc - by zazadudu - Sent from mobile version

Today, I'm 65 years old, and I've been given a bottle of wine produced in the year I was born. The wine tastes foul; not a good omen. FML

#563
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19333) - you deserved it (2349)

On 12/21/2008 at 7:14am - misc - by Phil - Sent from mobile version

Today, I played a table tennis final in public. After winning, I went to shake my opponent's hand. He doesn't react or move. It was only the first set. FML

#560
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14008) - you deserved it (9682)

On 12/21/2008 at 2:00am - misc - by Bito - Sent from mobile version

Today, Father Christmas touched my ass in a shopping mall. I'm a bit worried about what's going to happen on Christmas Day. FML

#559
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18163) - you deserved it (1939)

On 12/21/2008 at 12:04am - misc - by Loola - Sent from mobile version

Today, I opened a packet of cereal and it exploded on my keyboard; now, my keyboard crackles. FML

#556
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15039) - you deserved it (9984)

On 12/20/2008 at 3:16am - misc - by Rabzouz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up beside a disgusting guy I didn't know. He told me he was the best friend of the handsome guy I was hitting on yesterday evening. I can't remember at which point I got mislead into bringing the wrong one home. FML

#555
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5697) - you deserved it (26013)

On 12/20/2008 at 12:50am - misc - by elo - Sent from mobile version

Today, I decided to put my computer on slideshow mode. Did you know that hidden files are also read when you put slideshow on? I discovered this, as did my entire family, when my naked girlfriend appeared on the screen. FML

#549
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18138) - you deserved it (11384)

On 12/19/2008 at 12:17am - misc - by Mr Hawks - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am a Frenchie who's been in England for two months. While wanting to say to my technician that my manager made me groan during our meeting, I said that he made me moan. Now he keeps looking at me with a grin on his face. FML

#546
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17366) - you deserved it (3335)

On 12/18/2008 at 11:30am - misc - by ladyhead - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull)

Today, it's my birthday. It's 6.30 pm. I'm still the only person aware of what day it is. FML

#543
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29215) - you deserved it (2105)

On 12/18/2008 at 6:46am - misc - by poorgary - Sent from mobile version

Today, I bought "Angus, thongs and perfect snogging" on DVD. FML

#542
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7005) - you deserved it (23511)

On 12/18/2008 at 3:30am - misc - by Wickls - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got fed up with my neighbor who has been coughing, night and day, for six months. I rang at her door to tell her about several remedies I know of to help, so I could sleep. I thus found out she has lung cancer. FML

#538
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11918) - you deserved it (20849)

On 12/17/2008 at 10:38pm - misc - by kisyfrot - Sent from mobile version

Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML

#527
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31769) - you deserved it (1926)

On 12/16/2008 at 11:10pm - misc - by bloom - Sent from mobile version



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