Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

#1168
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16247) - you deserved it (2103)

On 01/14/2009 at 9:25pm - misc - by marlow - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was trying to finish an english assignment and I was not sure how to complete it. So I emailed my teacher asking and she said flip over the assignment handout page for instructions. FML

#1166
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4551) - you deserved it (22572)

On 01/14/2009 at 8:47pm - misc - by FUKDOUG - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a drunk girl asked me for directions to her hotel. I had just bought an empanada and was feeling good, so I agree to look up the address on my phone. Two minutes and a text charge later, I got the address. Out of inebriated glee, she hugged me and knocked the tasty empanada out of my hand. FML

#1108
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16494) - you deserved it (3743)

On 01/14/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Hungry - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the bagel shop down the street for breakfast, the same one I've been going to for over 6 months now. At the counter the same lil' cook guy who's served me over those same 6 months, looks at me and says, "Yes, Ms?". I'm a guy. FML

#1077
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17182) - you deserved it (2104)

On 01/14/2009 at 6:06am - misc - by dunnough - United States (New York)

Today, I got together with a small gathering of friends in a bar. I go up to the bar to order something, but with all the music and noise, the barman can't hear what I'm trying to say, so he leans forward, cocking his ear towards me. For some reason, I thought he was being friendly so I kissed him as if we were saying hello to each other. FML

#1056
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8952) - you deserved it (17287)

On 01/14/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Ad-s - Sent from mobile version

Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML

#1052
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5549) - you deserved it (35357)

On 01/13/2009 at 8:05pm - misc - by dannij08 - United States (California)

Today, I threw a rock in the air and watched it soar. And watched it come back down and hit me in the face. Gravity. FML

#1028
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5776) - you deserved it (44500)

On 01/13/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Gale - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I'm a 23 year old girl who often has to wear two pairs of socks. I don't have four feet, but I have no boobs. FML

#1019
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18370) - you deserved it (5207)

On 01/13/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by carrie - Algeria

Today, I saw a friend in the street but he didn't see me, so as a joke I decided to ring him. He took his mobile out of his pocket, sighed and didn't pick up. FML

#1016
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30606) - you deserved it (2763)

On 01/12/2009 at 9:47pm - misc - by patty - Sent from mobile version

Today, as I came out of some changing rooms in a clothes shop, I gave back all the stuff I'd tried on to a saleswoman. I then walk off, make it about a couple of yards, change my mind and decide to purchase one of the items I'd tried. When I get back, the saleswoman was spraying the changing room I'd used with deodorant. FML

#1015
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14167) - you deserved it (8443)

On 01/12/2009 at 8:35pm - misc - by carla - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, my mother bought me Mickey Mouse shaped burgers for my dinner. I'm 19. FML

#998
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14732) - you deserved it (5471)

On 01/12/2009 at 10:56am - misc - by ana9 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was putting a new lightbulb in when my wife walks into the room and says "you can't see a thing, i'll turn the light on for you". And she did. FML

#981
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23749) - you deserved it (1856)

On 01/11/2009 at 11:35pm - misc - by Christoams - Sent from mobile version

Today, I have a degree in electrical engineering, my wife was doing a crossword and asked me what are the units of capacitance, I couldn't remember. FML

#967
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13621) - you deserved it (7674)

On 01/11/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by jibjab - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: