Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my parents told me that they received a letter from a prison. Being curious they opened it up and read the entire thing. It was from this girl I randomly met. Now I have a prison stalker and my parents think I date felons. FML

#3360
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18950) - you deserved it (2298)

On 01/29/2009 at 12:04pm - misc - by K Holed - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy the Plan B pill. The pharmacist recognized me and said, "Really? Again?" FML

#3333
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8793) - you deserved it (32991)

On 01/29/2009 at 10:19am - misc - by Hahaha - United States (California)

Today, my friend had to leave work early for a funeral and on his way out I wanted to say something. All I could think of was "have fun". FML

#3269
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7437) - you deserved it (17914)

On 01/29/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by jalopenos - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, my friend and I were in a hallway talking while a man kept walking by and turning around. I then asked him "WHAT are you LOOKING for!". It was a blind man. FML

#3202
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5847) - you deserved it (24216)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by wsumt - United States (Ohio)

Today, my friend sent me the link to this website with a message that said, "You'll feel at home." FML

#3195
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18910) - you deserved it (2520)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by AKN - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML

#3194
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5894) - you deserved it (22583)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:32pm - misc - by Owned - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. I pulled a muscle taking my sweater off in the locker room. FML

#3193
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25230) - you deserved it (5725)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:30pm - misc - by j4y - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

#3178
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17693) - you deserved it (4757)

On 01/28/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by im_a_mocker - United States (New York)

Today, my roomate took the toilet paper out of my bathroom. I went into his room to look for it, only to find a large wad of it balled up near his laptop and mouse. FML

#3161
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19200) - you deserved it (1791)

On 01/28/2009 at 5:35pm - misc - by flying solo - United States (California)

Today, I drank a good amount of vodka and cut my own hair. FML

#3156
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5383) - you deserved it (39031)

On 01/28/2009 at 5:20pm - misc - by 315 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I marked the 6th anniversary of the last time I had intercourse. FML

#3114
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34449) - you deserved it (4977)

On 01/28/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, my grandmother who has Alzheimer's and can't usually remember my name, had a sudden moment of clarity and asked me why I'm still not married yet. FML

#3070
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24284) - you deserved it (1774)

On 01/28/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by calikola - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on my 18th birthday, my mom told me the man I thought was my father for 18 years was actually not my father, and my real father was in prison for murder. FML

#3036
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44918) - you deserved it (1640)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:42am - misc - by kiddo - United States (Illinois)



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