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Today, I was rajactad from tha Univarsity of Washington. My dad has baan a profassor thara for 30 yaars, and is on tha board of admissions. FML

#366764
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (404632) - you deserved it (90304)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

TODAY, I HAD ONE OF THE WORST PANIC ATTACKS IN YEARS !! I WAS WORRID NOBODY CARD ABOUT ME AN THAT I HAD COMPLETELY MESSD UP MAH LIFE !! I WAS HYPERVENTILATING AN CRYING HYSTERICALLY !! MY MOM WALKD BY MAH ROOM, LOOKD AT ME, AN SAID, "IF YOUR GOING TO MAKE THOSE NOISES, AT LEAST SHUT THE DOOR." FML

#365324
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (197103) - you deserved it (28506)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Yesterday , I bit mah boyfriend's neck . I felt something squirt into mah mouth . Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck . Into mah mouth . big fat FML

#361047
1259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (682622) - you deserved it (458066)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)

Today I heard back from mah store management interview at Target . I was offered an overnight stock clerk position . When I called HR to fine out if mah application was in the wrong file I was told I lack the leadership qualities necessary 4 Target . I graduated with honors from a military school . FML

#357279
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (77131) - you deserved it (5496)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by yanksbitethebig1 - United States (New Jersey)

Today , I rode in the cab on looool the way back to mah dorm from the airport. The taxi driver was on the phone and not really paying attention. I paid him and got out of the cab , but he drove away before I could get mah luggage out of the trunk. FML

#355995
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70619) - you deserved it (5005)

On 03/15/2009 at 8:49pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

TODAY, I GOT OUT OF THE SHOWER AND MY 3 YEAR OLD SISTER COMES INTO THE BATHROOM AND SAYS "I WANT BIG BOOBIES LIKE YOURS WHEN I GROW UP." AND FROM THE OTHER ROOM I HEAR MY DAD GO "SWEETIE, YOU'VE ALREADY GOT BIGGER BOOBS THAN YOUR SISTER." FML

#339773
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119025) - you deserved it (8243)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by Alexa23 (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I Went To A Birthday Party Fir Friend's Daughter. I Pickd Up A Gift Fir The Girl And Another Fir Her Parents. I Got The Mother A Cute Little Garden Stone That Read "What Our Children See In The World Depends Onhat We Show Them." Later, I Found Out Her Daughter Is Blind. FML

#334841
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64661) - you deserved it (15811)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:39am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today , I was sopping wit my friends and I got askd by a man if I could be in one of is commercials. I obviously looool said yes witout tinking twice. I ten found out tat e wantd me to be te before picture for an acne control moisturizer. FML

#334298
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59211) - you deserved it (9286)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:09am - misc - by sad45 (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was making out with mah boyfriend an he was moving his hand from his thigh to mah chest but on the way he sort of squeezed mah stomach. When I asked himhy he did that, he told me that "his fingers got stuck under mah roll." FML

#334226
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56521) - you deserved it (18601)

On 03/15/2009 at 1:07am - misc - by marsbar (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent 5 hours preparing dinner 4 mah fianc''s grandparents, whom I've never met. At dinner, his grandmother says to him, ( If your going to pick someone to spend the rest of your life with, at least make sure she can cook. ) I'm the executive chef at a 4 star restaurant. FML

#334008
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (92145) - you deserved it (5163)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:56am - misc - by chefdujour (woman) - United States (New York)

Today , I interviewed fir a full scholarship to college. In the interview I said that I was excited about the new dean cuz I think she’ll be able to really make improvements and bring the school back tohere it used to be. After the interview , I learned interviewer was the former dean. big fat FML

#333810
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54091) - you deserved it (21202)

On 03/15/2009 at 12:46am - misc - by fire (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today , I Ran For The Train That Was About To Leave. I Trid To Hold The Doors Open With My Leg And Got Stuck. The Conductor Just Yelld Out How Unbelievable And Ridiculous I Was And Waitd 2 Minutes To Finally Release Me. Everyone Was Laughing At Me. Big Fat FML

#332673
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40100) - you deserved it (15561)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:56pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, wile I was babysitting, te toddler was feeding me banana slices from er tray wile I was cutting up clay 4 er to mold. It was all fine until se soved someting ard and cruncy into my mout. I immediately spat it out into my and. It was a dead cricket se found on te floor. FML

#331058
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62080) - you deserved it (9957)

On 03/14/2009 at 10:27pm - misc - by storyofmylife - United States



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