Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

#23513
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13129) - you deserved it (29413)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by tylerlove361 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend started affectionately calling me "Burt Reynolds" because I wax my upper lip. FML

#23475
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24532) - you deserved it (5006)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:24am - misc - by C. Kronick (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a flight attendant asked me if I was airsick because I looked really pale. I told her that was my normal complexion but thanked her for her concern. She insisted "No, that can't be normal." FML

#23429
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35844) - you deserved it (2394)

On 02/11/2009 at 12:16am - misc - by Casper (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend was tapping on my thigh to the beat of the music when we were driving to dinner. When I asked him what he was doing he replied, "Just watching the ripples." FML

#22681
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34890) - you deserved it (5605)

On 02/10/2009 at 10:11pm - misc - by thunder thighs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got on Facebook and realized the only two friend requests I've had in 2 months are both from my parents. FML

#22156
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31213) - you deserved it (4872)

On 02/10/2009 at 8:22pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Tennessee)

Today, someone in class was making a point about premarital intercourse - "90% of teen virgins aren't saving it for marriage, they just can't get any." Another classmate pointed me out specifically. FML

#21964
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37280) - you deserved it (3053)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:41pm - misc - by herpderp (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mother and I got into a huge fight about me being a lesbian. It ended with me saying "Fuck you!" to which she responded: "I bet you'd probably like to." FML

#21834
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79681) - you deserved it (24713)

On 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm - misc - by peacock_mina19 - United States (Michigan)

Today, my sister teased me about being a mistake baby. When I told my mom what my sister said, her response was "I still love you anyway". FML

#21737
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34656) - you deserved it (3177)

On 02/10/2009 at 6:41pm - misc - by melissa (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I made a joke about having a wedding to my mom and she told me not to joke about something that will probably never happen. FML

#21465
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32154) - you deserved it (2973)

On 02/10/2009 at 5:30pm - misc - by NoWedding (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to get my school picture taken, when the photographer looked at me, saying, "You look like you need a mirror." FML

#21181
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24712) - you deserved it (3329)

On 02/10/2009 at 4:15pm - misc - by greattt (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boss asked me to pick up an extra shift. I said I couldn't because I have a date. He told me I didn't need to lie and to just say no next time. FML

#20879
13 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35534) - you deserved it (2347)

On 02/10/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by Flavorite (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, in basketball practice my coach was putting is in teams to run drills. He points to me and says, "You, go babysit my son by the stage." FML

#20586
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26439) - you deserved it (2492)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:41pm - misc - by nj (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was walking my son to school. After yelling at him for not looking where he's walking, I grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to me. Not paying attention, I walked him right into a light pole. FML

#20511
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6825) - you deserved it (48503)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by EOJ (man) - United States (Michigan)



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