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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my friend sent me the link to this website with a message that said, "You'll feel at home." FML

#3195
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16628) - you deserved it (2260)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:33pm - misc - by AKN - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, me and a friend I met in the club were sandwiching this blonde girl dancing, when 5 minutes later she turned around and said that I should get another girl and gently brushed me aside. FML

#3194
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5266) - you deserved it (19884)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:32pm - misc - by Owned - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)

Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. I pulled a muscle taking my sweater off in the locker room. FML

#3193
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23125) - you deserved it (5374)

On 01/28/2009 at 7:30pm - misc - by j4y - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

#3178
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15436) - you deserved it (4278)

On 01/28/2009 at 6:35pm - misc - by im_a_mocker - United States (New York)

Today, my roomate took the toilet paper out of my bathroom. I went into his room to look for it, only to find a large wad of it balled up near his laptop and mouse. FML

#3161
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17215) - you deserved it (1617)

On 01/28/2009 at 5:35pm - misc - by flying solo - United States (California)

Today, I drank a good amount of vodka and cut my own hair. FML

#3156
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4322) - you deserved it (35008)

On 01/28/2009 at 5:20pm - misc - by 315 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I marked the 6th anniversary of the last time I had intercourse. FML

#3114
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32274) - you deserved it (4705)

On 01/28/2009 at 3:18pm - misc - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, my grandmother who has Alzheimer's and can't usually remember my name, had a sudden moment of clarity and asked me why I'm still not married yet. FML

#3070
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20772) - you deserved it (1478)

On 01/28/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by calikola - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on my 18th birthday, my mom told me the man I thought was my father for 18 years was actually not my father, and my real father was in prison for murder. FML

#3036
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43028) - you deserved it (1523)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:42am - misc - by kiddo - United States (Illinois)

Today, I posted on a forum asking if I could be a moderator. Instead, I got banned. FML

#3026
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5449) - you deserved it (23035)

On 01/28/2009 at 10:00am - misc - by hypebeast - United States (New York)

Today, I broke, shoveled, and salted the ice covering my entire driveway. The size is roughly 8 cars' worth, and took me two hours of back-breaking effot to clear. I completely forgot that it was supposed to rain later today. FML

#3014
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6901) - you deserved it (13485)

On 01/28/2009 at 9:15am - misc - by bedrockmike - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was discussing my family heritage with my girlfriend's parents. The moment I told them that I came from a German background, her seven-year-old brother pointed at me and yelled, "HITLER!" FML

#3008
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17998) - you deserved it (1849)

On 01/28/2009 at 8:38am - misc - by razzmataz - United States (California)

Today, I gathered the courage to participate in a class discussion. My professor laughed at me. FML

#2972
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22389) - you deserved it (2052)

On 01/28/2009 at 6:03am - misc - by Noname - United States (Texas)



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