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Today, is my 16th birthday. Thinking that my parents would be out of town for it like they had every other year, I decided it would be fun to tan nude in my backyard. Apparantly my parents set up a surprise party for my sweet 16. I was standing naked infront of half my school. FML

#385817
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (108675) - you deserved it (40836)

On 03/16/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by badbirthday (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. His hot co-worker came to have a beer with us, and I knew my best friend would think he was gorgeous. I wanted to take a picture of him without knowing, so i tried to hold up my phone and pretend to be texting. The flash went off. FML

#385410
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14816) - you deserved it (92353)

On 03/16/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States

Today, I had a meeting with my super-hot TA. When I got to her office, she complimented me for being early, to which I thoughtfully replied "oh I usually come early." She laughed. FML

#379796
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50337) - you deserved it (30761)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:40pm - misc - by SmoothTalker (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found an old dress in my house laying around. I decided to dye it green to wear it out on St. Patrick's day. Turns out it was my grandmother's wedding dress that my sister was planning to wear for her wedding. FML

#379533
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34661) - you deserved it (157643)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:29pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML

#377584
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38338) - you deserved it (179329)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:02pm - misc - by natty (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I spent a solid four hours and over one hundred dollars preparing a nice fancy meal for my new girlfriend. A delicious three pound rack of ribs with a sweet and sour marinade. Steam broccoli with melted cheese. Home made buttermilk biscuits. I serve the meal. She doesn't eat beef. FML

#374506
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26154) - you deserved it (60925)

On 03/16/2009 at 5:55am - misc - by WhatdyaDo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML

#370215
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44363) - you deserved it (30578)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by textraped (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was talking to this hot girl I have dinner with every week. Lately she’s always telling me how she loves me and I do the same. Today she said: "The way we talk and act around each other, people would think we were dating." My answer was: "Aren't we?". FML

#369529
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74128) - you deserved it (13125)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was rejected from the University of Washington. My dad has been a professor there for 30 years, and is on the board of admissions. FML

#366764
345 comments

I agree, your life sucks (382281) - you deserved it (71199)

On 03/16/2009 at 12:05am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had one of the worst panic attacks in years. I was worried nobody cared about me and that I had completely messed up my life. I was hyperventilating and crying hysterically. My mom walked by my room, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make those noises, at least shut the door." FML

#365324
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182532) - you deserved it (20397)

On 03/15/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

#361047
1222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (642201) - you deserved it (429687)

On 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm - misc - by KAAALIS (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I heard back from my store management interview at Target. I was offered an overnight stock clerk position. When I called HR to find out if my application was in the wrong file I was told I lack the leadership qualities necessary for Target. I graduated with honors from a military school. FML

#357279
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70107) - you deserved it (4424)

On 03/15/2009 at 9:09pm - misc - by yanksbitethebig1 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I rode in the cab on the way back to my dorm from the airport. The taxi driver was on the phone and not really paying attention. I paid him and got out of the cab, but he drove away before I could get my luggage out of the trunk. FML

#355995
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64854) - you deserved it (4477)

On 03/15/2009 at 8:49pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)



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