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Man or woman?

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

#3373378
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16531) - you deserved it (51503)

On 06/30/2009 at 6:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was riding my bike on the side of the road because there was no sidewalk. Then a car with a loud horn honked at me. Pissed off, I turned around and screamed "shut the fuck up!" It was my girlfriend's parents saying hi. FML

#3349914
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14013) - you deserved it (62844)

On 06/29/2009 at 11:01pm - misc - by ZZ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on my honeymoon to Hawaii. My family decided to surprise my new husband and I by joining us on our vacation. FML

#3345356
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82476) - you deserved it (3189)

On 06/29/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by marriedwithfamily (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my mom, sister, and I were talking about a friend's girlfriend. My sister's opinion of her was that she was cute but not hot. My mom agreed, saying that she didn't think that someone without boobs could EVER be hot. She then looked at me and said "no offense." FML

#3341978
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46090) - you deserved it (3355)

On 06/29/2009 at 7:07pm - misc - by Atomic_Tangerine (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I left on a 2 month trip. I was in a hurry to pack so I wouldn't miss my plane. There were 2 piles of clothes on my bed. One pile was clothes that didn't fit to take to a thrift store, one was to take with me. Guess which one I brought? FML

#3341149
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17108) - you deserved it (54654)

On 06/29/2009 at 5:52pm - misc - by Cheech (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML

#3338347
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62337) - you deserved it (4755)

On 06/29/2009 at 3:55pm - misc - by thatCanadianGuy7 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I put on my "fat jeans" because none of my other jeans fit. Neither do my fat jeans. FML

#3335401
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25007) - you deserved it (43130)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a facebook relationship request from my crush of 2 and a half years. I was so excited until he posted on my wall, "Sorry wrong Catherine". FML

#3334835
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46710) - you deserved it (5357)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:31pm - misc - by wowzersthatsucks - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at the mall with my boyfriend and 2 friends. My uncle passed by me in the mall. He said "What are you baby-sitting or something?" He pointed to the merry-go-round. My boyfriend was sitting on the giraffe yelling at the top of his lungs. FML

#3333969
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47981) - you deserved it (12026)

On 06/29/2009 at 11:41am - misc - by merkris (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called my Dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell was. She then informed me that our Dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML

#3332242
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51445) - you deserved it (3013)

On 06/29/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by shroomda (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML

#3330800
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44591) - you deserved it (15399)

On 06/29/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Asterisk1009 (man) - United States (Texas)



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