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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML

#5328146
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36502) - you deserved it (2878)

On 09/18/2009 at 4:06am - misc - by London (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I got pulled over for going a few miles per hour over the speed limit. The cop asked for my license and registration. I happened to look down at my wallet while he was processing everything and saw my license in my wallet. I gave the cop my fake I.D. FML

#5325524
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7830) - you deserved it (62170)

On 09/18/2009 at 12:20am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my car into the shop to get a minor problem fixed. I left several hours later, without my car. Why? The mechanic crashed it while out on a test drive to make sure he'd fixed the problem. FML

#5319386
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35304) - you deserved it (1710)

On 09/17/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by mmv - United States (Colorado)

Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML

#5315969
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39079) - you deserved it (9443)

On 09/17/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by sara (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I went to a bar during Irishfest. When I returned to my girlfriend she was crying and told me that this guy pushed her. I confronted the guy and poured my beer on him who just happened to be the chief of police. He was trying to make room for a guy in a wheelchair. FML

#5313316
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12426) - you deserved it (50939)

On 09/17/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by nV1ous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was running late for work. As I hurried out the door, I managed to trip over my own feet, fall off the front porch, and key my new car. FML

#5309799
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32393) - you deserved it (7110)

On 09/17/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by Masey (woman) - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with diabetes. I went to tell my grandpa, who immediately said, "I'm sorry, let's go get ice cream to cheer you up." FML

#5307828
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42828) - you deserved it (3653)

On 09/17/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it's my 17th birthday. I asked for a newer car because my car right now sucks. I got a book on photography. I don't own a camera. FML

#5304412
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17291) - you deserved it (50919)

On 09/16/2009 at 11:16pm - misc - by civic4life (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML

#5303139
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33483) - you deserved it (2814)

On 09/16/2009 at 10:23pm - misc - by Lulu (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was trying out for a play I really wanted to be in. After my audition, I was feeling really good. She said she would post the cast list tomorrow. Not knowing where she would post it, I asked her. Her reply? "It doesn't matter. You won't be on it anyway." FML

#5303014
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33889) - you deserved it (2900)

On 09/16/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by Kat (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a stop light when I saw a cute police officer at the light across the intersection. Trying to be cute as I drove by, I turned and winked and waved. The car in front of me stopped, I rear ended them and then got rear ended. The cute cop winked back, then wrote me a ticket. FML

#5294180
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7720) - you deserved it (53567)

On 09/16/2009 at 4:08pm - misc - by Jennnn (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family gathered to pray. It was my brother's turn to pray and he ended with this, "...and help Chev that he does not become the disappointment everyone expects him to be. Amen." I looked on in shock as my entire family nodded and said "Amen" in agreement. Hi, I'm Chev. FML

#5293926
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39881) - you deserved it (4834)

On 09/16/2009 at 3:58pm - misc - by jaskyriddims (man) - Dominica (Saint George)

Today, somebody broke in to my house and stole my laptop, which had years worth of family photos on it. Where was I when it was stolen? At Staples, buying supplies that included CDs to finally back up my pictures. FML

#5288568
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44499) - you deserved it (4923)

On 09/16/2009 at 6:37am - misc - by fobfan14 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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