Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, there was a 10-minute cloudburst. It started 30 seconds after I parked my car and ended 30 seconds after I arrived at the office. Now the sun is shining, the sky is blue, and I look like I took a shower fully clothed. Oh, and I'm wearing thin white pants. FML

#4181864
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40818) - you deserved it (7174)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by Soaked (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting on the train and some crazy man started talking to me. I ignored him, and he tapped on my shoulder. He started blabbing and I just pointed to my ears and mouthed "I'm deaf." He stopped talking. A minute later my phone rang and I answered it without thinking. FML

#4181466
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8510) - you deserved it (69662)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML

#4179768
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48524) - you deserved it (2179)

On 07/31/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by roofer (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was walking around Walmart feeling pretty good about myself as I received numerous looks from guys in passing. All of a sudden a man approached me to tell me that my dress was extremely see-through. And, since I was wearing a thong, he and everyone else could totally see my ass. FML

#4178652
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11604) - you deserved it (54784)

On 07/31/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by EmBAREassed (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my family took me to a wig store saying I wouldn't feel so insecure about being bald because of my chemo treatments. When I told them I accepted myself and didn't want a wig, they came out and told me THEY couldn't accept it. My own family is embarrassed of me over something I can't control. FML

#4177051
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (91336) - you deserved it (3341)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by Betrayed (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at the Polish border when I found my passport was gone. I contacted the last place I stayed at and the owner said he would handle it. I reluctantly agreed as I was being charged international rates. Apparently, "taking care of it" means telling the embassy I'm retarded. FML

#4176027
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32959) - you deserved it (5658)

On 07/31/2009 at 4:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I was talking to my guy friend on the phone. He said, "You sound depressed, I should cheer you up and give you a big hug." Jokingly, I responded, "You wouldn't hug something as gross as me." His response? "You'd be surprised." FML

#4174665
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13413) - you deserved it (39923)

On 07/31/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by Girafarig (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I covered for my friend at work because he said he was having car troubles and was going to be late. Two hours into the shift, I got a call from my roommate asking why my girlfriend had moved out. Turns out, I'd covered my friend's shift so he could help my girlfriend move out behind my back. FML

#4173235
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44545) - you deserved it (2856)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I decided to check my email on our family computer. Since my dad's account was already logged on, I chose to use his instead of logging on my own. When opening up a new page and seeing his recently viewed sites, I learned that he loves to watch porn. I also learned he has a foot fetish. FML

#4172225
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29866) - you deserved it (17665)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the doctors getting a pap smear and she asked if it was alright if a doctor in training could come in to observe. I was already laying on the table with my feet in the stirups so everything was in plain sight. When the man came in to observe I looked up to see my brother in law. FML

#4161962
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48307) - you deserved it (2510)

On 07/30/2009 at 1:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was downtown with my boyfriend around Noon when we walked past a few guys who shouted out to me "You're the most beautiful girl we've seen all day". My boyfriend's response was "It's still early." FML

#4156114
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47918) - you deserved it (4019)

On 07/30/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by epicc1584 - United States (Maryland) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I cleaned my house after a big party. Everything was great when my parents came home. Except for the bottle of hot and spicy mustard next to the shampoo in the shower. No one knows how it got there. I'm busted because of mustard. FML

#4155760
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10971) - you deserved it (36361)

On 07/30/2009 at 6:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York) - moderated by the Jackass crew



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