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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I went to start my just bought '79 VW bus. I put my key in but stopped due to the strong gasoline smell. I went to check. Found puddle of gas. The previous owner figured duct taping a cracked tank was the same as fixing it. And didn't bother to share that tidbit with me. FML

#7386415
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13196) - you deserved it (27118)

On 01/16/2010 at 9:35pm - misc - by VeeDubDisaster (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I woke up at 2:30 AM. Thinking I was going to be late for my 3:30 AM flight, I rushed into the bathroom to shower. As I came out of the shower, I slipped and broke my arm. I then realized my flight is tomorrow. FML

#7384100
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31992) - you deserved it (8520)

On 01/16/2010 at 7:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was telling my cousin about my boyfriend, who plays guitar and sings very well, has dark hair, and wears girl pants. After telling her these things, she's quiet for a moment before she looks at me and says, "So... You're dating a Jonas brother?" FML

#7380443
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10112) - you deserved it (42066)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:05pm - misc - by kikinemo (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I wanted to remove my mustache hair with hot wax. The hair is still there, but my skin is all burnt dark brown. Tomorrow is my first day at school. FML

#7378045
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25349) - you deserved it (11843)

On 01/16/2010 at 1:16pm - misc - by queenofdeath - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I found on the internet pictures of me sleeping. I sleep naked. FML

#7377706
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (7621)

On 01/16/2010 at 12:51pm - misc - by be_so_slick_56 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I rang my dad to tell him and my half-sister that I'm finally engaged. I then asked my half-sister to tell my stepmother. Still on speaker, I heard her run upstairs and pass the good news on. My stepmother responded with 'Cery who?', followed by 'So what? I can't stand her'. I'm Cery. FML

#7376584
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31500) - you deserved it (2353)

On 01/16/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by ThatCery (woman) - United Kingdom (St. Helens)

Today, my smoke alarm went off. In a frenzy, I called 9-1-1 and exited my house. Several minutes later a fire truck showed up. After investigating, one of the firemen informed me I needed to change the batteries in my smoke alarm. FML

#7375995
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7589) - you deserved it (35967)

On 01/16/2010 at 10:37am - misc - by lollerskate (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out what I look like drunk and naked while swinging a tennis racket thanks to a picture message forwarded to just about everyone I know and some I don't. Among the numbers the text was sent to was a familiar one. My mom's. FML

Today, I spent the day studying with one of my classmates whom I've just met. While studying, she kept bragging about her boyfriend and decided to show me a picture of him. It was my boyfriend. FML

#7372755
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44045) - you deserved it (2560)

On 01/16/2010 at 2:17am - misc - by shockedgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was getting off the bus, when these two guys behind me started commenting on my bag, oblivious to the fact that I could hear them say, "Look at his ugly man-purse," and "It that looks like the satchel that Indiana Jones has". I'm a girl. Who is planning majoring in fashion studies. FML

#7370561
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27287) - you deserved it (8638)

On 01/16/2010 at 12:14am - misc - by Indiana (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a popcorn kernel stuck in my throat. It was quite irritating so thought I could get it out with my finger. Good thing, the kernel is gone. Bad thing, I now have the rest of my lunch on my shirt as well. FML

#7370442
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7354) - you deserved it (30247)

On 01/16/2010 at 12:08am - misc - by emilyupsidedown (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to see John Mayer. Being 6'2", I didn't think there would be any trouble seeing the stage, until three 6'6" men stood directly in front of me, pissed in a cup and managed to spill it over me. FML

#7368221
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30492) - you deserved it (4591)

On 01/15/2010 at 10:30pm - misc - by edot (man) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, while getting gas, a hottie pulled-up to the pump next to me. I finished filling my tank and started to drive away. As I was checking her out and paying no attention to my driving, I ended up taking the front bumper off her car with my truck. FML

#7366734
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5524) - you deserved it (37982)

On 01/15/2010 at 9:25pm - misc - by mah (man) - United States (New Hampshire)



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