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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was late for an interview. Going into the elevator, a man ran up to the doors but since I was late, I pressed the "close" button. When I arrived to the office, the secretary asked me to wait. The boss walked in to interview me. The man whose face I closed the elevator doors on. FML

#6338565
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5897) - you deserved it (52114)

On 11/17/2009 at 4:23am - misc - by xYumix - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was running a meeting feeling very stressed. I grabbed my stress ball out of my bag, squeezing it vigorously throughout the meeting. When I stood up to talk my stress ball exploded all over my new black suit and the desk. So much for relieving stress. FML

#6337825
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25072) - you deserved it (3862)

On 11/17/2009 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was in my hot tub with my brand new phone. I set it down and when I grabbed my towel I knocked it into the water. I quickly snatched it up and dried it off with the towel and suprisingly only one button stopped working. It was the unlock button, a perfectly good phone that I can't use. FML

#6337523
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7654) - you deserved it (44094)

On 11/17/2009 at 1:48am - misc - by JakeHolmes (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after sleeping in, I finally sorted through a stack of mail I had been putting off and I found a Jury summons. Thinking it must be coming up soon, I checked the date, my appearance is scheduled for 7:45am on November 16th. Today is November 17th. FML

#6337405
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6615) - you deserved it (35615)

On 11/17/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by Nic (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML

#6336608
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16592) - you deserved it (25650)

On 11/17/2009 at 12:25am - misc - by HunniBeeHuni (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend whom I love dearly because he doesn't share his feelings and won't commit. Yesterday, he wrote me a long love letter telling me he wanted to marry me. One of my kids had shoved it under my printer and I didn't find it until after he had moved out. FML

#6335376
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32047) - you deserved it (9901)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:13pm - misc - by lynxstorm - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to a phone call from my boss' wife. She demanded to know how long we'd been sleeping together. When I denied her allegations, she screamed that she knew all about my "history of sleeping with married men". I'm a virgin and I have to work with him tomorrow. FML

#6335196
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32700) - you deserved it (1902)

On 11/16/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by bad_day_in_hell - United States (Montana)

Today, my boyfriend decided to be romantic and literally sweep me off my feet... directly into a door frame. Now my face is bruised, and the police officer at my school has asked me if I need to make a report about anything. FML

#6332669
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24095) - you deserved it (2027)

On 11/16/2009 at 8:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my sister was playing a rock star in a play. When she got home, she told me she used one of my old guitars, because I told her it was ok. I said she could take one to practice on, not destroy on stage. FML

#6326232
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28472) - you deserved it (3568)

On 11/16/2009 at 1:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a card from the jewelry store thanking me for purchasing an engagement ring a year ago and wishing me and my fiancée a long and everlasting marriage. Too bad my fiancée took off with the pizza delivery boy 6 months ago. FML

#6325970
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32657) - you deserved it (2017)

On 11/16/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by figures (man) - United States (New York)

Today, the maintenance workers finally came to my apartment to fix the shower-head that kept falling off the wall. I was annoyed because they had replaced it a few weeks ago and since then, it'd been a problem. They went into my bathroom, turned the shower head around, and left. FML

#6324713
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6118) - you deserved it (23301)

On 11/16/2009 at 9:04am - misc - by BadatDIY (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I stood in line for one hour to get a new phone. It then took me 2 minutes to drop it and shatter the screen, and 2 seconds for the employee to look at, laugh, and tell me, "That Sucks." FML

#6322699
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14947) - you deserved it (29541)

On 11/16/2009 at 2:29am - misc - by bananaface (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, feeling like I needed to relax, I ordered room service at my hotel. When I was finished I went to put the tray outside not thinking about needing a key to get back in. I locked myself out of my room wearing happy face underwear in a $250 a night hotel. I had to go to the lobby to get a new key. FML

#6321079
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8646) - you deserved it (23672)

On 11/16/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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