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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, somebody broke in to my house and stole my laptop, which had years worth of family photos on it. Where was I when it was stolen? At Staples, buying supplies that included CDs to finally back up my pictures. FML

#5288568
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44316) - you deserved it (4910)

On 09/16/2009 at 6:37am - misc - by fobfan14 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was giving a speech to my 300 some-odd person class. All throughout it, people had been giggling and cackling while I was speaking. I soon realized that my pants had been unzipped. I accidentally fell asleep with all my underwear in the washer last night and had gone commando that day. FML

#5288482
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35812) - you deserved it (19575)

On 09/16/2009 at 6:21am - misc - by BluesMan1990 (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was arguing with one of my professors. She said that all married couples fight and I told her that my parents have never argued or fought about anything. When I got home my parents told me that they're getting a divorce. FML

#5288032
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40323) - you deserved it (12029)

On 09/16/2009 at 4:38am - misc - by omgstfuplz (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my (now former) best friend kicked me out of the band I started because I wasn't 'dedicated enough' after a 3 day 'holiday' to visit my dying uncle. He also during this 3 day 'holiday' convinced my girl friend to leave me and date him. FML

#5287985
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53456) - you deserved it (2988)

On 09/16/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by dj163 (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my mom was criticizing how I can't handle taking care of any living thing because I'm too irresponsible. We had a huge argument so I went back to my apartment, only to find that my fish had died. I forgot I had a fish. FML

#5286860
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6787) - you deserved it (54211)

On 09/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by FlipYoC (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my anxious and obsessive mother is going to drive three hours every weekend to attend a Johns Hopkins medical course on stress reduction. Why is this bad? I just left home for college and have enjoyed my last two weeks of freedom without her around. I attend Johns Hopkins. FML

#5274396
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33756) - you deserved it (2799)

On 09/15/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by notcool - United States (Maryland)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line tells me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I've got a headache, my legs are stiff and my date must think I stood her up. The tech finally arrives, pries the door open, then rudely asks, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML

#5272541
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38310) - you deserved it (3054)

On 09/15/2009 at 1:16pm - misc - by Stuckism (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, I was first in line at a stoplight. After five minutes, with a line of cars behind me, the light was still red. People behind me started honking, so I decided to just go. Halfway across the way, I was greeted by a camera flash. Nobody else went. FML

#5270007
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11246) - you deserved it (48719)

On 09/15/2009 at 8:16am - misc - by publicenemy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had dinner with my family in celebration of my 19th Birthday. I've been hinting that I need a new laptop for months now and I was sure my family had bought me one. I have got a pair of slipper socks. FML

#5269202
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28858) - you deserved it (8679)

On 09/15/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by Unloved. (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my piano teacher told me that she "forgot" to inform me that she volunteered me to play a 5 page song in a recital in front of 300 people that's happening next week. FML

#5267545
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35130) - you deserved it (2921)

On 09/15/2009 at 2:16am - misc - by pianonerd (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I asked my dad to pick me up from school, he said he couldn't. Why? he was busy playing world of warcraft for the night. I got to walk the 3 hours home while my 49 year old dad played computer games. FML

#5263427
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43001) - you deserved it (4218)

On 09/14/2009 at 10:56pm - misc - by stupid (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I drove by a restaurant I ate at yesterday. I write a food review column for my college paper, and I've tried everything on their menu. They were being closed down today because a large amount of rat droppings was found in their food supplies. FML

Today, I realized the guy I've been hooking up with has a daughter who is a year younger than me. As if that wasn't bad enough, I also found out she had a child of her own. I've been hooking up with a grandpa. FML

#5254272
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24657) - you deserved it (40449)

On 09/14/2009 at 5:11pm - misc - by nen_00 - United States (Iowa)



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