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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I spent 30 minutes trying to find my glasses. I don't know whats worse, the fact that I was wearing them the whole time, or that my girlfriend played along and helped me look for them. FML

#6594028
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11477) - you deserved it (32050)

On 12/04/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by wobbles (man) - United States (California)

Today, my mom admitted that her story about my dad leaving us for his current wife was a lie. He left when he caught her with a coworker. She blocked his number and got a restraining order to keep him from telling his side of the story. I haven't talked to my dad for six years because of this. FML

#6590388
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51079) - you deserved it (2230)

On 12/03/2009 at 9:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, we had my school musical. The girls have to wear long skirts. I had a thong on, and while we were dancing the guy behind me stepped on my skirt. It fell to my ankles... the whole audience saw my ass. FML

#6584375
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29934) - you deserved it (18129)

On 12/03/2009 at 2:20pm - misc - by NoName (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I saw a girl walking to class by herself. I thought she was weird for not having any friends to walk with. Thats when I realized I was eating lunch by myself. In my car. FML

#6583766
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11023) - you deserved it (39733)

On 12/03/2009 at 1:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

#6582615
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26901) - you deserved it (6921)

On 12/03/2009 at 11:08am - misc - by urinanalysis (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my friends were convinced that I was gay. I have known most of them for 3 plus years, they all thought my girlfriend was a special shopping partner. I found this out while announcing my engagement. FML

#6580015
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33051) - you deserved it (2921)

On 12/03/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I turned eighteen. Thinking I was going to get a big present from my parents on this special day, I eagerly unwrapped my present. They got me a bag of M and M's. Last year I got flannel bed sheets. FML

#6579645
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32244) - you deserved it (4378)

On 12/03/2009 at 2:33am - misc - by bdaygirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got invited out by friends for coffee after I broke up with my boyfriend. When I told my mom where I was going, she looked at me and said, "But you don't have friends. All your friends are pixels. Where are you really going?" FML

#6578691
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29913) - you deserved it (3558)

On 12/03/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by friendless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I bought $300 worth of climbing equipment because I had lost mine six months ago, I hadn't gone to the climbing gym since I'd lost it. I went today because I was so excited to go climbing again. However, it turns out that I'd left my gear there, and it had been in the Lost and Found for the past six months. FML

Today, my parents invited all their kids and grandkids to join them on a vacation trip to the mountains; all their kids except me, that is. I'm not invited. But they did invite my ex-husband. And his new girlfriend. FML

#6572169
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45475) - you deserved it (3131)

On 12/02/2009 at 7:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got my first acting part. I played the role of a bad boy who has to grab the leading lady's ass, who then slaps me in the face. The ass grab was done in one take. The slap required 14 takes. FML

#6570901
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40451) - you deserved it (4740)

On 12/02/2009 at 6:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my lawyer threatened to sue me because I can't afford his bill, which he sent to me after getting me out of a lawsuit. FML

#6569414
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11876) - you deserved it (34453)

On 12/02/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I looked outside with a grimace at the very heavy rainfall through which I had to trudge a long way. I waited ten minutes for it to let up, only to find it was getting heavier. So, I started walking anyway. After getting soaked to the bone, I walked through my door, and it stopped. FML

#6567940
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26101) - you deserved it (3145)

On 12/02/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Furry (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)



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