Today, I walked home from a guy's dorm early in the morning, still wearing my dress and heels from the night before. I walked by a mother and her little daughter, who said "Mommy, why is she so dressed up so early in the morning?" and the mom replied "Because honey, she makes bad decisions." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17250) - you deserved it (50608)
On 02/27/2009 at 1:39pm - misc - by LuvShawn (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my family was leaving for a weekend trip and was supposed to pick me up on the way down. About an hour before they are supposed to arrive my mom calls to tell me that there's no room left in the car so they won't be stopping to get me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41749) - you deserved it (1391)
On 02/27/2009 at 1:17pm - misc - by leftbehind - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39679) - you deserved it (10857)
On 02/27/2009 at 12:43pm - misc - by wwasmer (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I fell out of the shower. It was still on. Bracing my fall, I reached into the toilet. It wasn't flushed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37892) - you deserved it (11560)
On 02/27/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Ackbar (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I was in my room and I drew a Harry Potter lightning bolt on my forehead in eyeliner because it cheers me up. Then some friends came over, so we went out to get yogurt, and when I got back I realized the lightning bolt was still there. I'm in college. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9332) - you deserved it (58789)
On 02/27/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by Fenny (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14203) - you deserved it (39532)
On 02/27/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by beachbum (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was sitting in the living room with my parents when my dad asked my mom if she knew where he could find some double a batteries. She said to check my vibrator. He said he already did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55744) - you deserved it (6609)
On 02/26/2009 at 9:25pm - misc - by lifesux17 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I put my hand into a vending machine to retrieve a bottle of water that was caught in the slot. After a minute, I realized I was trapped. 2 hours, 4 fire trucks, 3 police cars, and 1 ambulance later I was freed. The vending machine was in pieces and the bottle of water wasn't even for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37526) - you deserved it (9645)
On 02/26/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by VenderBender (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I went to go get a haircut and I asked how much it was for a haircut, shampoo, and a blow job. I meant to say blow dry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14093) - you deserved it (43000)
On 02/26/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Stixchop (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I took the subway to school. The man sitting across from me would not stop staring at my breasts, so when the train came to my stop, I said "Nothing to see now, asshole." Then I noticed his white walking stick as he got up to get off too. He was blind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8538) - you deserved it (63360)
On 02/26/2009 at 5:21pm - misc - by belladonna (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, a stoplight turned yellow as I was approaching it. I was about to go through but saw a cop, panicked, and slammed on the brakes. I ended up in the middle of the intersection and had to reverse. Soon the light turned green, and I stepped on the gas. My car was still in reverse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12896) - you deserved it (41168)
On 02/26/2009 at 11:17am - misc - by River (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, I accidentally locked my car and house keys along with my phone in my car. Then I had to break into my own house looking for the spare. Someone called the police and I had to explain that I lived there. I forgot to grab the spare when I went to talk to the police officers I locked the door behind me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30464) - you deserved it (6828)
On 02/26/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by MadameM (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to my crushes Mardi Gras party. He was handing out beads to all the girls at the party that flashed him. When he came around to me he stopped and said "I will give you these beads NOT to flash me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45748) - you deserved it (3370)
On 02/25/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by MADfml - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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