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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and ipod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML

#5958359
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48218) - you deserved it (2830)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:48pm - misc - by abdominates (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to remind my roommates of the importance of wearing clothing at all times in the common living area. My roommates are my parents. FML

#5957888
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34902) - you deserved it (5675)

On 10/23/2009 at 11:54am - misc - by ihatemylife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my son's teacher told me that I should take my son to the doctor, because he has been complaining of bad headaches. They ran some tests, and then removed a peanut that's apparently been lodged in his nose for months. FML

#5957039
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32134) - you deserved it (4806)

On 10/23/2009 at 10:06am - misc - by CarolinaD - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I took my SUV in to get the oil changed, and the tires rotated. They allowed me to stay there, because they said it would only take 30 minutes. So I sit there in the waiting room, and I look through the window only to see my SUV falling off the lift, from 6 feet in the air. FML

#5955896
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39173) - you deserved it (3240)

On 10/23/2009 at 6:09am - misc - by effmylife (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to complete a project for my course in Italian. We had to write a little paragraph about a friend. I had to make one up. FML

#5954994
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33551) - you deserved it (5710)

On 10/23/2009 at 2:51am - misc - by wahwah (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

#5954141
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11738) - you deserved it (44171)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while trying on a dress, my sister came up behind me and poked my back, asking, “What have you stuck down your dress?” I hadn’t put anything down the back of my dress; it was just my back fat. FML

#5953785
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24078) - you deserved it (9428)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I threw a paper ball into a recycling bin backwards. I don't know whats more sad: the fact that that was my highlight of my life, or I had been attempting to make that shot every day for 3 years. FML

#5953662
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26572) - you deserved it (6353)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:47am - misc - by efmylife (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was taking the bus to work and it was a rather bumpy ride. The child sitting across from me asked her mom if her chin moves like mine when the bus goes up. FML

#5949212
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22780) - you deserved it (6067)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by mandy (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was sitting in my bed drinking Yoohoo from a juice box. I decided it would be fun to see how much I could fit in my mouth. As soon as my mouth was full, I sneezed. FML

#5948720
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9167) - you deserved it (37694)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I took a smoke break at work and I noticed a huge zit on my face. I used the reflection from a window to take care of the problem and then realized that there was a staff meeting taking place on the other side. FML

#5947832
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10179) - you deserved it (36666)

On 10/22/2009 at 7:05pm - misc - by JC (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that sometimes I forget to turn off my desk light when I leave the room for dinner. I also learned that said desk light can get hot enough to melt plastic, which is why my brand-new laptop screen was literally oozing onto the table top when I got back. FML

Today, I told my dad that for Halloween I'm going to be an '80s workout Barbie. He just looks at me and says, "Yeah as the 'before' picture". FML



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