Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, we had a hike at my camp. We hiked in a line. I suddenly felt things hitting me at the back of the head. After a few minutes I finally turn around, only to discover a bunch of older guys throwing tampons at my head. They were my tampons, falling one by one out of my unzipped bag. FML

#4212486
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36427) - you deserved it (9007)

On 08/01/2009 at 7:13pm - misc - by Rachel247 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I was holding my baby daughter during a checkup. To reassure her, I was kissing the back of her head while the Dr. was checking her hearing. After a few minutes, I realized the Dr. had put his hand to steady her head. I was kissing his hand. FML

#4210609
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36587) - you deserved it (20903)

On 08/01/2009 at 5:37pm - misc - by smoochie -

Today, I got pulled over for the first time since I got my license. I have disorganized speech and occasional inappropriate emotional response. I began to laugh due to nervousness and when I tried to explain why, I was arrested because he thought I was high. FML

#4208437
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47841) - you deserved it (4843)

On 08/01/2009 at 3:24pm - misc - by Jesse (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was walking in the mountains when I tripped, I grabbed onto the fence in an attempt to soften my fall. The fence was electric. FML

#4206061
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51169) - you deserved it (4078)

On 08/01/2009 at 12:49pm - misc - by Electronotfriend (woman) - Poland (Pomorskie)

Today, my Dad sent me an e-mail wishing me a "Happy 21st Birthday, sweetheart!" The message went on and on about how much he loves and misses me and wishes we were closer, and can't believe how fast I'm growing up. I'm 23 and my birthday is in December. FML

#4203551
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47365) - you deserved it (2388)

On 08/01/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the mall and saw a really cute guy. I acted all cool and started doing a sexy hair flip. On the way back up from my hair flip I hit my head on a cellphone stand. FML

#4203484
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8027) - you deserved it (52804)

On 08/01/2009 at 8:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was wearing a skirt, and running towards a closing elevator, making it just in time. As soon as I ran in, my pad fell out of my underwear and onto the floor. There were 6 other people in the elevator. I picked it up before I realized I had nowhere to put it, so I held it. For 18 floors. FML

#4201501
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59362) - you deserved it (9517)

On 08/01/2009 at 4:15am - misc - by Alice (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was 'A man running'. I didn't even get an apology. FML

#4196733
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56217) - you deserved it (2343)

On 08/01/2009 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out if you slide down the stairs on a foam matress topper, it just folds under instead of sliding. Then you slide the rest of the way down on your knees and break your nose at the bottom. FML

#4186568
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14069) - you deserved it (64084)

On 07/31/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by ohhmydamn (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, there was a 10-minute cloudburst. It started 30 seconds after I parked my car and ended 30 seconds after I arrived at the office. Now the sun is shining, the sky is blue, and I look like I took a shower fully clothed. Oh, and I'm wearing thin white pants. FML

#4181864
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40655) - you deserved it (7161)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by Soaked (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting on the train and some crazy man started talking to me. I ignored him, and he tapped on my shoulder. He started blabbing and I just pointed to my ears and mouthed "I'm deaf." He stopped talking. A minute later my phone rang and I answered it without thinking. FML

#4181466
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8231) - you deserved it (68580)

On 07/31/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was working on a client's roof. Some neighborhood kids thought it would be hilarious if they knocked over my ladder. I was stuck on this roof in serious heat. I caught the attention of a pedestrian to come to my rescue. It was a little old lady. She gave me the finger and left. FML

#4179768
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48293) - you deserved it (2163)

On 07/31/2009 at 11:14am - misc - by roofer (man) - United States (New York)



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