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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I was walking around my new school trying to figure out where to go. Then I realized I was talking to myself. Out loud. FML

#8578589
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21057) - you deserved it (10276)

On 02/23/2010 at 1:25am - misc - by itsawonderfulife (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, we were drawing self-portraits in school. I'm horrible at art, so I turned to the person next to me and stated that mine looked really ugly. He replied saying, "No, it looks exactly like you." FML

#8557301
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26093) - you deserved it (6555)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:24pm - misc - by quasimodo - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML

#8557043
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32223) - you deserved it (2906)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:13pm - misc - by condiments - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML

#8555278
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14472) - you deserved it (22752)

On 02/22/2010 at 2:51pm - misc - by sacked (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend stole a pair of my underwear, and still wears them to this day. FML

#8553099
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28931) - you deserved it (2794)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:11pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my mom goes through my garbage. I'm 25 and don't live with her. FML

#8548832
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32432) - you deserved it (1889)

On 02/22/2010 at 8:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)

Today, I witnessed my roommate pop a blister with a skewer and casually place it back in the kitchen drawer, before wiping what seeped out with the teatowel. FML

#8547021
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30042) - you deserved it (1946)

On 02/22/2010 at 5:13am - misc - by OMFG (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was awakened, in the middle of the night, by the sound of crying coming from outside. There's a mile in between houses where I live. FML

#8546580
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32728) - you deserved it (2491)

On 02/22/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by holycow (man) - United States (California)

Today, while eating at an outdoor café, a man on the street came up to me and said, "My girlfriend is sexier than you, bitch." Thanks for the confidence boost. FML

#8539206
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31033) - you deserved it (2612)

On 02/22/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by sandiego - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking with a friend after buying two cups of steaming hot coffee. While crossing the busiest street in town I tripped and fell, spilling the coffee all over me. My friend didn't notice I fell right in front of her and tripped over me spilling her coffee on me as well. FML

#8528184
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23644) - you deserved it (2668)

On 02/21/2010 at 8:31pm - misc - by burnnnnn (woman) - Ecuador (Azuay)

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. I leaned down to get something out of my bag and hit my head on some protruding concrete. I said I was fine. Then blood came running down my face. FML

#8525883
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25032) - you deserved it (2720)

On 02/21/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by erin1985 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

#8519094
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6611) - you deserved it (47286)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by anna14 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, it was my first day of softball practice. I'm the youngest one on the team by about 2 years, so I wanted to prove I'm just as good as everyone else. Too bad I tripped in the outfield and got hit in the head with a bat. I have a concussion. FML

#8518590
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22581) - you deserved it (4384)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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