Today, my friends and I noticed that people, no matter what stereotype, pretty much all have the same type of friends: the mean one, the funny one, etc... and started naming off the people in our group who fit into those personallities. We got to the token fat one, everyone looked at me and stopped talking. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2009 at 5:42am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized how much I'm on the computer. I tried to "CTRL+Z" on something I wrote down on my paper. FML

by slcbabii23 / 10/01/2009 at 3:56am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my former high school's homecoming game. A classmate who I always had a crush on looks up and goes "Brian!", holding her arms out for a hug. I hug her and she seems a bit suprised but hugs back anyway. I get up and see another Brian from our class behind me. Shame. FML

by Jusawkward / 10/01/2009 at 3:07am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the realization that the 2-hour nap I wanted to take before I went out with my friends last night was actually a 12-hour nap. I missed everything. FML

by Ataraxia / 10/01/2009 at 3:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML

by egged / 10/01/2009 at 2:43am / Singapore / Miscellaneous

Today, I invited over 30 people to come to the park with me since the day was nice and cool. I sat there for three hours by myself. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2009 at 1:38am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into my bedroom and realized I really needed to clean it. As I started to pick everything up off of the floor, I tripped over a shoe, slipped on a water bottle, pulled down my shoe rack and landed in my armoire. My room is now dirtier than it was when I started. FML

by QuestionMyLife / 09/30/2009 at 8:56pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was looking at my wedding photos. The photographer moved onto the "candid" shots and thought it would be cute to have pics of us making out at the reception. I have blonde hair. The girl in the picture did not. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 6:57pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. I began to eat when I noticed a blond hair in my food. When that happened, I went up to the counter and began complaining about their hygiene. When the manager insisted no one that works there had long blond hair, I realized that it was my hair. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 5:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking to my mom about how my fiancé has been ignoring me and that I didn't know why. Turns out, my mother told him that I was too much of a handful, was mentally disturbed and also cheating on him. Just so I wouldn't move out and would keep cleaning her house for free. FML

by Notthemaid / 09/30/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my birthday. My best friend called me at work and offered to take me out to lunch. When he went to pay for the meal, his card was declined so I told him not to worry and that I would pay for the birthday meal. He looked at me and said "It's your birthday?" He was serious. FML

by Rockyio / 09/30/2009 at 1:45pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, after a month of searching, I found a perfect apartment which I rented out for the next few months. The rent was inexpensive and the place was close to my job. Turns out, my 'perfect' new apartment overlooks a nudist community. FML

by explodingpupppet / 09/30/2009 at 12:41pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting my boss' kids. I brought chocolate for them and the youngest said he had never had chocolate and didn't want any. I told him he should always try new things and should eat it. He did. He's allergic. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2009 at 11:39am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous