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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, after years of thinking I was weird for never being attracted to anyone, I realized that for the first time in my life I actually have a crush on someone. That 'someone' is my English teacher. He is 60. I am 18. FML

#9127097
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31520) - you deserved it (12859)

On 03/16/2010 at 6:27am - misc - by allwrong (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I chose a cute tank top and some shorts to wear. Later, I was shopping at Target with my dad when he pointed to a girl in the same isle and said to me, "Don't ever dress like that. It looks cute on her, but you couldn't pull it off." She was wearing shorts and a tank top. FML

#9124871
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28377) - you deserved it (4471)

On 03/16/2010 at 2:42am - misc - by Stella Grubner -

Today, I realized my girlfriend has way more friends than I do. How did I realize this? She called me to tell me she was at the beach with her friends and how much fun she was having. I was playing WoW in my room, and my friends don't answer my texts. FML

#9122950
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14582) - you deserved it (25700)

On 03/16/2010 at 1:12am - misc - by LonelyBoy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

#9117281
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10561) - you deserved it (39247)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm - misc - by hiii. (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I told my parents I wanted to try modelling. I decided that since I have such a low self-esteem, that it might benefit me, and make me feel better about myself and how I look. The first thing out of my dad's mouth was, "What? Why? You're ugly." Thanks dad. FML

#9111538
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34380) - you deserved it (7167)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I discovered that the wintergreen breath mints I've been taking for a week now, are actually circular, flavored, white and green laxatives. FML

#9111190
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9442) - you deserved it (26792)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was daydreaming in bed when my phone rang from across the room. I scrambled out of my covers, tripped over a pair of boots I had by the bed, and slipped on some jeans laying on the floor. Luckily, I answered my phone in time, but only to have my mom tell me to clean my room before she got home. FML

#9105957
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7315) - you deserved it (28888)

On 03/15/2010 at 4:12pm - misc - by katharine (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad and I were in the car when a rabbit scurried across the road, just missing us. My dad turned and said to me, "Well, it's good we didn't hit him. He gets to live another day." I then looked in the rear view mirror to see the rabbit running away from the cross traffic, only to be hit by the car behind us. FML

#9102050
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25404) - you deserved it (3331)

On 03/15/2010 at 12:44pm - misc - by bunnylover (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boyfriend offered to give me a piggyback ride from the house to the car as means of avoiding walking in mud. Both aware of how tall he is, he crouched extra low and I jumped extra hard. This makes for a terrible example of leapfrog, and a faceplant in the mud. FML

#9087167
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23378) - you deserved it (8545)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while walking to my car through the snow, I noticed the sunroof was open and 2 feet of snow had poured in. Angry, I opened the door to start cleaning. That's when I noticed all the wildlife that had taken refuge inside from the cold. Not only were my seat cushions wet, they were torn open. FML

#9085698
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9995) - you deserved it (24861)

On 03/14/2010 at 9:39pm - misc - by grann (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my deranged co-worker sent me a text message containing a picture that she just took of her uncle. It was his funeral. FML

#9083154
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23205) - you deserved it (1895)

On 03/14/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by thanatophobia - Sent from mobile version

Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML

#9077392
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25421) - you deserved it (2360)

On 03/14/2010 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML

#9070560
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27317) - you deserved it (11196)

On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States



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