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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I realized the closest person I have to a friend is the debt collector who calls me every day. FML

#6970939
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29985) - you deserved it (6278)

On 12/27/2009 at 7:40am - misc - by kanenakid - United States (New York)

Today, I bought a puppy. I just found out I can't bring it on the family trip. To save me the trouble of finding a friend to take her in, my mum handed her back to the pound. FML

#6969552
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31614) - you deserved it (3523)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:48am - misc - by DroopyDog (woman) - Netherlands (Flevoland)

Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML

#6969489
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11827) - you deserved it (26799)

On 12/27/2009 at 3:43am - misc - by Icy (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

#6968150
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29518) - you deserved it (3653)

On 12/27/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Fatty (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I backed out of the driveway of our newly built home. Being unfamiliar with the driveway, I ended up getting bogged in the mud and slid halfway down the steep slope of the front yard, trying free myself. I haven't met my neighbours yet. They stood in their front lawns watching me. FML

#6967912
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20359) - you deserved it (3846)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:58am - misc - by jaded_woman (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend had a Christmas party for all of our friends. He asked me not to get "too drunk". I think throwing up on the floor while simultaneously peeing your pants fit his definition. FML

#6966482
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5708) - you deserved it (41522)

On 12/27/2009 at 12:41am - misc - by Unfortunate (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my parents bought me an alarm clock that runs away from you while beeping obnoxiously when you hit snooze. I just had ankle surgery and am unable to walk. FML

#6966351
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30556) - you deserved it (2640)

On 12/27/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Crippled (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to an unfamiliar male face right beside mine. I flipped out fell of my 4 foot raised bed and got a concussion. Who, you may ask, was in my bed? My Robert Pattinson pillowcase. FML

#6963425
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8111) - you deserved it (66422)

On 12/26/2009 at 10:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling proud of myself because I finally quit World Of Warcraft. I later found out about the gift my dad's family gave me. It was a 12-month subscription to World Of Warcraft. FML

#6960254
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27655) - you deserved it (7945)

On 12/26/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by thatguy (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I drove my mom home from the salon because she was feeling sick. I'm not the best driver, but I was excited that I was helping. Everything was going smoothly until I hit a bump in the road. My mom blew chunks all over. I found out very quickly that she had spicy chicken for lunch. FML

#6958875
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21686) - you deserved it (2716)

On 12/26/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by taylor_eileen - United States (Indiana)

Today, my mother informed me that I am not allowed to drive in snow. I live in Minnesota. FML

#6958712
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27106) - you deserved it (2708)

On 12/26/2009 at 4:45pm - misc - by Snow (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out the gift card my friend gave me for Christmas actually has no money on it and was never purchased in the first place. FML

#6958051
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26870) - you deserved it (2093)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:48pm - misc - by DeannaMarie - United States (Florida)

Today, the painting I worked on for three weeks was rejected from an art contest because the rules prohibit fan art. It wasn't fan art. They mistook it for Twilight fan art. FML

#6957410
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29189) - you deserved it (7672)

On 12/26/2009 at 2:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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