Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, both my parents were at work so I was home alone. My boyfriend had wanted to surprise me and take me out to lunch. He found me dancing on my kitchen table singing "Like a Virgin" at the top of my lungs. FML

#10823884
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11609) - you deserved it (31722)

On 05/28/2010 at 4:37pm - misc - by crazygirl10 - United States

Today, while running late to my sister's wedding and rushing to get ready, I accidentally grabbed my travel size shaving cream can in place of my body spray, and quickly drew a blue foaming line across my rental tux. FML

#10821429
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29254) - you deserved it (13314)

On 05/28/2010 at 2:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I tested the new taps in the shower, with my head. Yep, they're strong enough. FML

#10817967
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9747) - you deserved it (24703)

On 05/28/2010 at 9:18am - misc - by gahdamnit - Australia (Victoria)

Today, it was the hottest day of the year so I opened my sun roof. The hottest day of the year was followed by the biggest storm of the year. I forgot to close my sun roof and my car is now flooded. FML

#10815057
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13201) - you deserved it (31058)

On 05/28/2010 at 2:20am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML

#10804191
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28625) - you deserved it (4755)

On 05/27/2010 at 6:50pm - misc - by Fark (woman) - United Kingdom (Cumbria)

Today, I came home to find my dad had backed into my already crappy car. The reason they didn't buy me a nicer car in the first place was they were afraid I'd wreck it. FML

#10802234
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28228) - you deserved it (3930)

On 05/27/2010 at 4:59pm - misc - by Nchristine - United States

Today, I found out that my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited. I had just finished planning a surprise party for her. FML

#10796974
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42976) - you deserved it (3188)

On 05/27/2010 at 10:06am - misc - by reginaphalange - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I picked up my 3 friends from a party. One of them drank too much and claimed she needed to throw up. I pulled over multiple times so she could. It didn't happen until we were right in front of her house and still inside my car. FML

#10788025
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27640) - you deserved it (3033)

On 05/26/2010 at 10:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found out I'm allergic to the pills my doctor prescribed for coughing, which I really need because I ripped a muscle in my stomach. Now my whole upper body is covered in a terrible itchy rash. I also found out it will last for at least another week. FML

#10779349
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28316) - you deserved it (2461)

On 05/26/2010 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Geneve)

Today, a few friends and I ran through sprinklers at our school until we were all soaked. Then we were told that they put fertilizer in the water. I'm soaked in manure. Now I know why it tasted weird. FML

#10777630
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12089) - you deserved it (40185)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:35pm - misc - by noraidk - United States (Texas)

Today, I went into a music store to look into getting a new guitar. I picked up one that I was interested in and tried it out quietly. A sales representative approached me and asked me to "stop the noise and leave the guitars for serious customers." I've been playing for almost ten years. FML

#10777263
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (5806)

On 05/26/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I fell down the stairs carrying a huge TV. Don't worry, my body cushioned the TV's fall. FML

#10774629
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31968) - you deserved it (4718)

On 05/26/2010 at 10:21am - misc - by hatestomove - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a first date wearing a new hair color. It was Interior Latex Slate Speckled Grey, from accidentally leaning my head against a wall while house painting earlier. FML

#10772348
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21414) - you deserved it (13717)

On 05/26/2010 at 4:18am - misc - by pandasbear - United States (California)



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