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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my stomach started to hurt. When I got home, my parents had company over, which I had to rush past to use the bathroom. After being in the bathroom for about 3 minutes, my mother yells to me from the other room, in front of the guests, "Are you OK in there?" I'm 27. FML

#21382322
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26277) - you deserved it (3523)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:12am - misc - by struckbystarzz (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I stopped by my local bar to maybe meet some new people. I sat in between two groups. Within a minute both groups got up and left. FML

Today, some well-meaning soul told me to just pray my depression away, which would be about as effective as praying away a knife in my shin. FML

#21382206
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23622) - you deserved it (3278)

On 03/27/2015 at 1:31am - misc - by an anon - United States (California)

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22343) - you deserved it (8726)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, after days of looking for it, I finally found the ring my boyfriend gave to me. It was on my roommate's finger. FML

#21381743
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32256) - you deserved it (2484)

On 03/26/2015 at 6:16am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, a coworker jokingly noted that my signature looks like "Pedo". I couldn't see it that way, so I asked some other people for their opinion. They confessed they'd always thought it looked like "Pedo", but never said anything. My name is Peele. I've been signing it off as Pedo for 10 years. FML

#21381199
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26695) - you deserved it (3205)

On 03/25/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by peele - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, while studying for a big test at the library, some idiots started playing hide-and-seek. After putting up with their snorting and giggling for nearly an hour, I finally lost my shit and told them to knock it off. I then got kicked out for causing a disturbance. FML

#21380708
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27783) - you deserved it (3533)

On 03/24/2015 at 12:51pm - misc - by faaail - Ireland (Cork)

Today, an old lady was walking behind me. She tripped and started to fall, so naturally I turned and outstretched my arms to catch her, but was too late. A man turned just in time to see an old lady on the ground with me with my arms stretched out. I now have a black eye. FML

#21380543
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30430) - you deserved it (2184)

On 03/24/2015 at 2:58am - misc - by why me - United States (Georgia)

Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML

#21380370
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25767) - you deserved it (13597)

On 03/23/2015 at 9:04pm - misc - by Li - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I heard what sounded like water against my window, and I couldn't believe it was raining in Southern California at this time of the year. I then turned to the window to see a hobo peeing on my window. FML

#21380308
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29990) - you deserved it (2209)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:19pm - misc - by jumanji (man) -

Today, I had to sit in a three-seat truck between my dad and his best friend on a 4-hour trip to Detroit. It was great, besides their incessant crude jokes and stories, including chafing ball sacks, and naming their new radio station, "Chicks With Dicks Radio." FML

#21380298
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23589) - you deserved it (2298)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my teacher took my test along with another student's and gave us both a zero. Why? Because we both have colds so when we breathe through our nose it makes a sniffle noise. She thought we were using a secret code to communicate by sniffling. FML

#21380083
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36925) - you deserved it (2230)

On 03/23/2015 at 11:43am - misc - by Mr. Sniffles - United States (Ohio)

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32805) - you deserved it (6565)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States



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