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Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML
Today, I was watching Ratatouille. Piece of advice for starving students: never watch it when you've only eaten two apples in two days, or you'll find yourself in the ridiculous position of being jealous of a fucking rat. FML
Today, my parents left early in the morning to run some errands, and I thought it would be nice to shovel our rather large driveway for them while they were out. An hour later, they returned from the store with a snow blower. FML
Today, I overheard my mum tell my sister that she should make me a bridesmaid at her wedding. My sister scoffed, "She looks like Shamu, mum. I can't have THAT in my wedding pics." followed by laughter and my mum saying, "Touché." FML
Today, my grandma said, "I know you don't have any plans tonight. Do you want to go to bingo with me?" I said sure out of pity, and ended up being her designated driver after she got wasted later in the evening. FML
Friday 18 April 2014