Today, I saw a very attractive young woman struggling with some boxes. The seduction attempt resulted in me carrying 60lbs of items for 30mins. When we got to her apartment, she thanked me and introduced me to her boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16959) - you deserved it (28093)
On 04/07/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by JacktheRussian (man) - United States
Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML
I agree, your life sucks (24434) - you deserved it (3888)
On 04/07/2013 at 2:52pm - misc - by DJ (man) - Ireland (Dublin)
Today, my sister was faced with the choice of getting a burger, or picking me up in a snowstorm. The burger won, and I had to travel 4km home by foot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28323) - you deserved it (1654)
On 04/07/2013 at 1:01pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I took multiple pictures of my blanket and pillow pet, trying to get the "perfect pose" so I could post it on Facebook with a cheesy joke. I'm 30. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12245) - you deserved it (29551)
On 04/07/2013 at 8:07am - misc - by kimhinesvoinea - United States
Today, it is my birthday. Since my parents are in the middle of a divorce, my mom thought it was perfectly reasonable to burn the gifts my dad got for me in the fireplace. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45251) - you deserved it (2156)
On 04/07/2013 at 5:19am - misc - by child of a crazed women (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, my dad had a little too much to drink. When he's that drunk, he likes to pepper me with a lot of random questions. He asked if I've ever tried hard drugs, and if I want to die. I answered no to both of the questions, and he demanded to know why not. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25063) - you deserved it (1702)
On 04/06/2013 at 1:06pm - misc - by yeah why not (woman) - Norway
Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34986) - you deserved it (15530)
On 04/06/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by Evalynne - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45614) - you deserved it (4127)
On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I carried flat-packed boxes home from work to move my things into a new apartment. Whilst walking down the street, the wind kept blowing and spinning me round. A crowd eventually gathered, mistaking me for a street performer. Nobody helped or even threw me any loose change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24167) - you deserved it (2324)
On 04/05/2013 at 7:04am - misc - by Gem - United Kingdom (Nottingham)
Today, I woke up from a nightmare that I've been having for a couple of weeks. In the nightmare I'm shot four times in the back by none other than my mother. I'm getting worried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25539) - you deserved it (2040)
On 04/05/2013 at 1:28am - misc - by slightlyworried (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29166) - you deserved it (4371)
On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32730) - you deserved it (4922)
On 04/04/2013 at 2:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, while shopping for a birthday present for my size 0 friend, I picked out a pair of pants for her. When paying, the cashier looked me up and down and said, "Well, you're pretty optimistic aren't you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (40651) - you deserved it (2711)
On 04/04/2013 at 11:12am - misc - by NotASize0 (woman) - Denmark
Friday 24 May 2013
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