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Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

#21376642
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32448) - you deserved it (4212)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by Idigrespectfulattire (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, at 2:00 am, my neighbor discovered "What Does The Fox Say?" He loves it. FML

#21376518
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27857) - you deserved it (2049)

On 03/17/2015 at 5:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, for the second time, I had an argument with my mother about whether William Shakespeare was a real person or not. FML

#21376501
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25130) - you deserved it (2260)

On 03/17/2015 at 4:35pm - misc - by ohno - United States (Michigan)

Today, during a date with my girlfriend, I found out you can hiccup hard enough to convince someone that you're having a seizure. FML

#21375726
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28550) - you deserved it (2279)

On 03/16/2015 at 3:15pm - misc - by redneckpunk (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad turned up drunk to an intervention for my brother's drug addiction. FML

#21375677
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31558) - you deserved it (2172)

On 03/16/2015 at 1:55pm - misc - by not a jesse pinkman joke (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. The first thing he did was hand me a paper containing listed rules he expects me to follow. When I asked if it was a joke, he promptly pointed to number 7 on the list, "Cleanliness is not a joke". FML

Today, my dad turned off our cable. The reason? His favorite character from The Walking Dead died. FML

#21375425
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31988) - you deserved it (3075)

On 03/16/2015 at 12:37am - misc - by jfields2474 - United States (California)

Today, while driving, I saw someone's hubcap blowing away behind me on the highway. I thought it was funny and sort of chuckled to myself. Later I realized it was my hubcap. FML

#21375160
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16507) - you deserved it (24704)

On 03/15/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by epicvixen - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was so drunk that I forgot how to use the key to my front door. But I knew how to break a window, get into my locked basement, and unlock the basement door with my front door's key. FML

#21374433
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22651) - you deserved it (15281)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:52pm - misc - by nomorealcoholeva - Norway (Nordland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my instructor turned up late to get me for my driving test. I soon realized something was seriously wrong. Turned out his wife left him last night, and he'd been drinking the pain away all morning. He ended up rear-ending another car, and now I have to reschedule my test. FML

#21374413
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30066) - you deserved it (2214)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML

#21374172
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27159) - you deserved it (7638)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:27am - misc - by thecarisfine (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while walking my dog, we came across two men having a heated argument in the street. My dog decided the perfect place to poop was right next to them. He wouldn't budge no matter what. Meanwhile, one of the men pulled a knife, and I practically shat myself. FML

#21374140
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29694) - you deserved it (2440)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I decided to have cereal for breakfast. I poured the cereal in the bowl, added the milk and had a spoonful. Then I realized that my cereal was moving in the back of my mouth. FML

#21374137
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31001) - you deserved it (3274)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:27pm - misc - by Eddy (man) - United States (Arkansas)



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