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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my older brother puked in the sound hole of my sister's guitar. He blamed it on me, and in revenge my sister beat me with the guitar. FML

#21383103
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27182) - you deserved it (1826)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by Pukey - United States

Today, I found out that the creepy weirdo who's been sending me messages for a while is just my dad. His excuse was, "I wanted you to feel like someone would actually like you." FML

#21383075
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27106) - you deserved it (1961)

On 03/28/2015 at 4:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was uninvited from my own birthday party. FML

#21382721
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29460) - you deserved it (2683)

On 03/27/2015 at 11:42pm - misc - by BirthdayBoy - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I discovered that when my mom can't sleep, she comes into my room and reads my text messages. FML

Today, I found my dad's porn stash on his laptop. I went through it for a laugh to see what kind of sick, twisted shit he's into. Mostly nude pictures of my mum, as it turns out. I can't wipe the afterimage from my mind. FML

#21382495
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11219) - you deserved it (37494)

On 03/27/2015 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while getting ready for a job interview, I sneezed while brushing my teeth, splattering toothpaste everywhere and ruining my brand new dress. FML

#21382482
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26846) - you deserved it (4093)

On 03/27/2015 at 4:09pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I fell asleep in class... And woke up hour later. My teacher let me sit there till I woke up to see what my face would be like waking up to a new class. FML

#21382364
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25803) - you deserved it (16323)

On 03/27/2015 at 11:27am - misc - by BERNDTOAST - United States (Michigan)

Today, my stomach started to hurt. When I got home, my parents had company over, which I had to rush past to use the bathroom. After being in the bathroom for about 3 minutes, my mother yells to me from the other room, in front of the guests, "Are you OK in there?" I'm 27. FML

#21382322
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26331) - you deserved it (3527)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:12am - misc - by struckbystarzz (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I stopped by my local bar to maybe meet some new people. I sat in between two groups. Within a minute both groups got up and left. FML

Today, some well-meaning soul told me to just pray my depression away, which would be about as effective as praying away a knife in my shin. FML

#21382206
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23677) - you deserved it (3285)

On 03/27/2015 at 1:31am - misc - by an anon - United States (California)

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

#21382179
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22401) - you deserved it (8747)

On 03/26/2015 at 11:28pm - misc - by comfort_ - United States (Georgia)

Today, after days of looking for it, I finally found the ring my boyfriend gave to me. It was on my roommate's finger. FML

#21381743
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32309) - you deserved it (2486)

On 03/26/2015 at 6:16am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, a coworker jokingly noted that my signature looks like "Pedo". I couldn't see it that way, so I asked some other people for their opinion. They confessed they'd always thought it looked like "Pedo", but never said anything. My name is Peele. I've been signing it off as Pedo for 10 years. FML

#21381199
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26719) - you deserved it (3208)

On 03/25/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by peele - Estonia (Harjumaa)



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