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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was on the internet playing a game. I have a speech impediment, and the guy running it told me to get off his server for making fun of disabled people. FML

#21199175
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45642) - you deserved it (3776)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:37am - misc - by Wow (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 11-year-old son and I took an IQ test for a laugh. To be honest, I've often suspected that I may have some form of mental retardation, but I didn't expect to get a score of 79, while he got one of 114. FML

#21198731
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41431) - you deserved it (6673)

On 07/04/2014 at 6:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, a guy told me that I look like Angelina Jolie. Before I could thank him, he continued, "I mean like in the chest area. After the mastectomy, you know?" FML

#21198697
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37123) - you deserved it (3313)

On 07/04/2014 at 5:30pm - misc - by fleatitting fame (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML

#21198479
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25253) - you deserved it (38545)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:35pm - misc - by Oops - United States

Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML

#21197788
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48079) - you deserved it (6017)

On 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AJL - United States

Today, I moved fifteen stacks of bricks from our store to a customer's van. After I made all that effort, he decided he didn't like the colour of the bricks after all, and demanded a full refund. FML

#21197488
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44543) - you deserved it (3250)

On 07/03/2014 at 3:49pm - misc - by starflares (man) - Denmark (Centre)

Today, I was showing the guy I like something on my phone. My period tracking app decided it was the perfect time to tell me that I need to stock up on tampons, because I'm getting my period tomorrow. FML

#21197391
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43087) - you deserved it (7861)

On 07/03/2014 at 1:53pm - misc - by blood buddies - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I came home from vacation, only to find my neighbours relaxing on my patio, and their kids swimming in my pool. FML

#21197297
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48652) - you deserved it (4141)

On 07/03/2014 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my shoes were rubbing against my heel so much that one heel started to bleed. Not having any plasters, I stuffed some tissue down my shoe. When I walked off the train, a wad of blood-stained tissue fell out the back of my shoe. The guy behind me didn't think it came from my shoe. FML

#21196551
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39793) - you deserved it (4817)

On 07/02/2014 at 7:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Harrow)

Today, my dad finished installing our new home security system. One of the features lets him control any light in the house from his phone. He keeps trying to piss me off by turning my bedroom light on at random intervals. I don't know how to make it stop, and I can't sleep. FML

#21196465
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46597) - you deserved it (4469)

On 07/02/2014 at 5:52pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my sister was upset because she felt like no one liked her. Without thinking, I replied, "It's okay. If I acted like you, people would probably hate me, too." This sounded sympathetic in my head. FML

#21195344
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33835) - you deserved it (21157)

On 07/01/2014 at 5:57pm - misc - by wiifantcso (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I watched a Youtube video about artists who ripped off other artist's songs. All of the bands that were accused of stealing were all bands that I really enjoy. FML

#21194507
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34670) - you deserved it (9767)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:12am - misc - by dillon (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at my grandparent's funeral, we were waiting for the pastor. He was fashionably late because he couldn't find his sunglasses and had gone to buy new ones. FML

#21194487
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39322) - you deserved it (2942)

On 06/30/2014 at 11:59pm - misc - by too cool (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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