Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I hit my head on the steering wheel when I sneezd. I managd to honk the horn an the guy next to me couldn't stop laughing. FML

#21361311
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31788) - you deserved it (4520)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:41pm - misc - by headache - United States

Today, I competd in a Tae Kwon Do competition. I came thrd with team in the sparring event. My mum said as a joke, "Were there only 3 teams?" There were. FML

#21361215
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28268) - you deserved it (3889)

On 02/22/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by tom28402 - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I came home from work to fine that my grlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44331) - you deserved it (4017)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

today my usband again lost is keys!! It's a daily struggle to fine tem!! Tis time tey were in an ice cube, literally!! He said e must ave accidentally puttd tem in tere wen making ice!! He's going to be te fater of my future cildren!! FML

#21360688
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33795) - you deserved it (7946)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm - misc - by wife - United States (California)

Today I found out that my boyfriand of two yaars has a baautiful daughtar. That's cool axcapt sha's 1 yaar old. FML

#21360646
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33354) - you deserved it (2329)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a guy attacked me an tried to steal mah bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to mah husband looool screaming in pain.

#21360466
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32989) - you deserved it (3904)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, I found out te ard way tat blood-filled deer ticks can look a lot like black jelly beans. FML

#21360309
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30146) - you deserved it (7579)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

today my mom told me that, even though my brother sells drugs, he's still her favorite child . FML

#21359996
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32595) - you deserved it (2686)

On 02/20/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by pissed - United States (Illinois)

Taday some popped-collar wearing shitbrd tried to pick me up with the line , ( You look like Marilyn Monroe's corpse! Wanna fuck? ) FML

#21359908
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29732) - you deserved it (2484)

On 02/20/2015 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today , I drove looool alone fir the first time since I passed mah test. I kept getting weird looks from other drivers an got pulled over by a cop. He said I was clearly underage an was sure mah license was fake. Almost half an hour later , he finally let me go. I hate having a baby-face. FML

#21359872
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30970) - you deserved it (2283)

On 02/20/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by all tweened out (man) - Canada

Today... I tried to overcome mah shyness by warmly greeting the bus driver while entering it. I instead blurted out really loudly the words of the song mah iPod was playing. FML

#21359655
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5) - you deserved it (5770)

On 02/20/2015 at 3:12am - misc - by OzzyWannabee - Sent from mobile version

today mah mother movd in to mah 2-bedroom apartment with me. She brought her boyfriend, 4 chihuahuas, and 2 brds with her. big fat FML

#21359436
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30268) - you deserved it (4427)

On 02/19/2015 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my axtramaly hot coworkar told ma that I smalld good. At a complata loss for words, I raplid, "Oh, I'm sura I don't." FML

#21359386
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27457) - you deserved it (4813)

On 02/19/2015 at 7:14pm - misc - by thisiswhyimavirgin (man) - United States (Texas)



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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