Today, my husband came home from work angry. He started yelling about how much he hates the neighbor's kids and that he never wants to have children. I was going to tell him I'm pregnant tonight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (84535) - you totally deserved it (2532)
On 03/29/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Had you been trying to get pregnant, or did the birth control fail. If you were trying to get pregnant, then I'd like to think you had already had that discussion with your husband. If birth control failed... well, then FYL
#1 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:04am by dave2001soa
He doesn't mean it (I hope). He's probably just angry and we all know guys will say anything when they're angry. Tell him tomorrow.
#2 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:06am by paigeorose92
He's a smart husband very smart. Hope he means it too. Looks like it's time for you to find a doctor if you know what I mean. That is if you want to stay married and all.
#3 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:14am by mercedeslove
#3 that is awful.
He doesn't mean it, Anon. He's talking out of anger. I hope you feel better about all of this and congratluations for your baby!
#6 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:17am by Jessica19374698
#3, that is terrible and I say that even when I'm pro-choice.
OP, I'm sure your husband will feel differently about his own children, but maybe pick a better time than right after the neighbor kids just pissed him off. I know you didn't tell him just then, but if you pick a good time, I bet he'll be ecstatic.
If you haven't already given him the news, I would ask if he really means that he doesn't want to have children. The neighborkids may be annoying but with your OWN children, YOU are in charge (you as in you and him). You can raise them not to be annoying/bad kids. I have a kid, I love him, and I do like his friends. I don't like c hildren. at.all. If he really means that, wow, why didn't you discuss that before you guys got pregnant or married? You can't change that. So then, no matter what he says, say that you're pregnant and plan to raise the kid. If he wants a divorce and doesn't want to do child-support, then divorce him and relieve him of his rights as well. If he wants to stay, you'd better get parent/couple counseling to sort it out. Best of luck to you both!
#9 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:25am by everythingtold
:/ Oh my gosh.
Like #8 said, maybe the neighbor's kids just did something to piss him off, I'm sure he really wouldn't say something like that about his own kids.
Just pick a good time to tell him, when he's happy.
Congratulations! :]
#11 - On 03/29/2009 at 10:26am by xXPeachRoseXx
I'm sure he was just angry at the neighbour's kid. It's totally different when it's your own child. I know my husband found other people's kids to be annoying, and he didn't like them, but he loves our daughter.
Maybe just have a talk with him and let him know and go from there. and Congratulations!!
just wait a couple of days, he'll calm down and i'm sure he'll love the news when you tell him! congrats :)
just wait till he calms down.
he is just upset and probably didn't mean anything he said.
most guys say random crap when they are upset.
Kids of your own and kids in general are 2 different things. All kids are hellspawn, but your own kids are saints. So don't worry abou it.
Atleast thats how parents see it in general.
Let him calm down,
all men are crazy when it comes to kids,
until they have their own
i'm sure everything will workout fine.
#18 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:11am by brittanylynn
That is so sad! Maybe he'll end up liking your child, cuz neighbor's children are usually pretty irritating!
#19 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:26am by CorynneCade
Probably was talking out of anger. Most people HATE other people's kids, that is why it's so hard for step parents and all that to accept OTHER people's children. I would say that if he had a child of his own, he would love him/her very much so.
#20 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:30am by NorfolkDude
He was probably just really pissed because the neighbours did something annoying.
Just let him calm down first.
Tell him tomorrow or another day or something.
Hopefully he'll be excited. If he's not, he's an idiot.
#21 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:30am by CandyKisses
But now he gets his very own child to bug the crap out of the neighbors as pay back!!
#24 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:40am by JillianIsLoveee
I'm sure he will be happy to hear your news, just pick an apt moment. Good luck, and congratulations :)
Congratulations!
I am sure that he won't feel that way about your child,
and that him saying he never wants them was out of anger towards the
neighbor and his or her kids.
BEST OF LUCK WITH THE NEW ONE & THE HUBBY. :D
I wouldn't let that get you down. He was just angry and started to vent his frustration. I work at Disneyland, and I'm constantly venting to my coworkers about how much I hate children and how people need a license to breed now-a-days, but I know that isn't true. I'm sure he'll be ecstatic to hear he's going to have his own children. :)
You're husband is right, kids are annoying. Even your kid will annoy the crap out of someone at some point. How did you not talk about the kids/no kids issue before getting married?!?
#29 - On 03/29/2009 at 12:25pm by whiterabbit
What?? He came home from work angry, but he was angry about the neighbor's kids? What do the neighbor's kids have to do with his work?
Sounds like your husband is just an angry, dissatisfied person in general. I'm willing to bet he was angry at his boss or supervisor and can't take it out on them, so he tells you he's angry at the neighbor's kids.
The good news is that he doesn't really hate kids. The bad news is, he is an angry person who looks for things to take his anger out on. Good luck with your marriage and your new baby.
YDI for getting married without even talking over whether or not you want kids. That's just common sense.
#32 - On 03/29/2009 at 12:36pm by frozen_heart
Men say this sort of thing all the time. He's saying it out of anger. Once he finds out he's having his own children, his mind will quickly change. What one says in a rash moment rarely reflects on what they actually believe.
#33 - On 03/29/2009 at 12:45pm by buymeagoat
Hmm, seems like a good sign to me. He won't be taking any crap from the little guy, and he'll grow up right proper.
Lol. I doubt he meant it. Congratulations.
aw, he was probably just pissed at the neighbor's kids and didn't mean it. people get that way sometimes..
#35 - On 03/29/2009 at 12:47pm by interventions
Hopefully there's still time for the old close hanger trick. If a child grows up with spiteful parents, he/she ends up doing drugs and having sex at 13. Well at least you can get on the Maury show.
well, i guess he could take comfort in the thought that once your child is old enough, he can tell them to go beat the snot out of the neighbor kids.
Everyone saying why didn't they talk about kids before they got married - it sounds to me like the pregnancy wasn't a planned one. If they'd been trying for a baby, OP wouldn't have to worry about whether he meant it or not because he'd have already told her he wanted kids.
OP - go with what everyone else was saying and tell him when he's not mad. Congratulations!
#39 - On 03/29/2009 at 1:44pm by hattehhatteh
I'm sure he didn't mean it. He was just angry.
Anyways, tell him later, when he's in a good mood.
#45 - On 03/29/2009 at 2:22pm by xiloveyoux3
It's different when it's your own kid. He is probably just annoyed with the neighbors kids because they are unruly or misbehaved. My uncle was the same way, but once my aunt had his daughter he loved her unconditionally and does everything in his power to be a great dad and take care of her. Like my dad said once "Everyone elses kids are annoying, mine are prefect!" Basically, kids are annoying until they are your own.
Oh something bad probably happened with the neighbors kids. He'll get over it. I'm sure he'll be excited :) Congratulations!
#47 - On 03/29/2009 at 3:00pm by wat_the_eff
Aw. Let him calm down, I mean, he had no idea. If he knew I bet he wouldn't have been so blunt. If he is mad at you then he does not deserve you.
Congratulations on your pregnancy though!
#52 - On 03/29/2009 at 4:35pm by Girlwithapearl2
his reaction mught change when u tell him . i mean come on it'll be something u and him share and theres no telling that ur kid is going to turn out like the neighbors child every kid is differant. so i hope everything goes well for u . congratulations by the way. =]
#3 you're horrible!!!
i agree with the others, he prolly only said it cause he was pissed off. i'm sure he'll be delighted when you tell him :)
oh and congratulation, that's wonderful news ^^ good luck!
Hopefully he only said it because he was in a bad mood. Tell him yalls kid will be better than the neighbor's!
#55 - On 03/29/2009 at 5:59pm by louisianagrrrrl
It might have just been his bad mood talking. Wait 'til he's feeling happier then tell him, I'm sure everything will be okay.
PS - #3 is an idiot. And I am pro-choice, btw
#57 - On 03/29/2009 at 6:34pm by xThatRandomGirlx
I'm reminded of the Sean Connery / Nicolas Cage movie: The Rock. The whole ranting about how you don't want to bring another child into this world because of how f'ed up it is, then the wife/girlfriend saying that she's pregnant.
On a separate note: If he didn't want to have kids he would have 1. worn a condom and 2 had her on birth control. His problem.......
#58 - On 03/29/2009 at 6:41pm by killersteve
I think you should've just blurred it to him that you were pregnant and I'm for certain it would have brightened his mood - his bad day forgotten. I know he doesn't mean it. He's just had a bad day and was upset. Anyway congrats!
#60 - On 03/29/2009 at 7:15pm by maiden_girl
He was angry but if he didn't mention it before he was just saying, he doesn't mean it.
Waiting something like a week to tell him would be appropriate.
#61 - On 03/29/2009 at 7:22pm by braFTW
Awww, awful timing. He probably didn't mean it though.
I adore children, but after a day at work when there's kids in the store who knock stuff over and make noise, all I can do at the end of the day is talk about how much I hate kids.
#63 - On 03/29/2009 at 8:25pm by x3samanthasue
So give him head first.
#3, you're a prick. Don't even joke about that shit.
#64 - On 03/29/2009 at 8:31pm by SpandexMan
wow hun that really sucks, I'm sure he doesn't mean it. You guys will be okay
#65 - On 03/29/2009 at 8:55pm by cheapshoes13
That sucks, unless you wanted to get pregnant. I know I'd be devastated, but I hate kids too. Hopefully he'll come around.
Whoa. Had you guys not talked about having children?? Were you not using birth control? It sounds like something went very wrong there!
#4 kindly STFU cuz that was rude!
#68 that is not her only option (and in my opinion it should not be an option because it's murder)
to the girl who posted this: don't worry about what he said, other ppl are right, guys tend to overreact and he probably didn't mean it just tell him tomorrow and i'm sure he'll be in a different mood :) good luck with the baby! hope all goes well :)
#70 - On 03/29/2009 at 11:15pm by my_life_sucks_17
That's a bummer but I agree with people who say to wait and tell him tomorrow/later. Just wait til he's in a better mood and tell him that you guys will do a better job and make sure your kids aren't little jerks. Congratulations, btw
#71 - On 03/30/2009 at 12:54am by nuga
He'll get over it of forget about your neigbour's kids soon.
#73 - On 03/30/2009 at 4:20am by lol_person2
Well tell him that this is a great opportunity to show those bloody neighbours how to raise a kid right. ;-)
Sorry, but I couldn´t myself.... Perhaps, one of the bes storys in this website....
Tell him latter... When you tell him we be the happiest guy on earth...
#76 - On 03/30/2009 at 11:27am by AndreWartyns
how did you not know he didn't want kids when you married him?? seems like a pretty important discussion to have...hopefully he'll feel differently when you tell him.
All the pro-choice-to-kill coat-hanger ppl need to STFU. Don't mind them, I'm sure you'll be great parents.
#79 - On 03/30/2009 at 1:29pm by MiriamSingsLoud
dont loose your confidence in telling him.. he was just pissed off.
he's gonna be very excited when you tell him, dont get discouragedd...
good luck :) and congratss
So? I love my Daughter more then anything. I hate other people's little brats. He was just pissed off.
#81 - On 03/30/2009 at 11:07pm by 100308
omg that sux! u shud still tell him though....im sure hell still b happy! and congrats on the baby too!
#83 - On 03/31/2009 at 12:03pm by ohshiitboi
I can confirm that guys will say anything when they are angry, even if they don't mean it. Wait till things cool down a little and tell him. I m sure things will turn out just fine
i'd say wait until he's calmer... maybe a day or two
it's not unusual to hate other people's kids
yet adore your own.
plus ... well your hubby can help raise your baby to be better behaved than the neighbor's kids :)
#85 - On 04/01/2009 at 6:10pm by were_giraffe
So, the female right to make plans for the next 18 years of her partner's life without even discussing it with him strikes again, and if he's not happy about it, the best advice you get is 'ruin his life, take his money and blame him'.
Yeah, that's working SO well for other women, that's why single moms are so cheerful all the time ....
woah woah woah #87, way to be a jerk. She never said she wanted this. Now would you relaxe. I say that things between them will be fine. Like a lot of people have said doesn't mean he doesn't want kids, just means he's had a bad day. Anonymous here can make her own decisions but if she loves him, which would be the reason she should have married him, she will not "ruin his life, take his money and blame him". She will talk it out, if he is irashonnal she'll either get ride of the baby, give it away or keep it and get ride of him. But I am hoping for the baby's sake that doesn't happen. The father should be over joyed that he has such a wonderful wife and a new baby coming along.
#88 - On 04/06/2009 at 12:59pm by cheapshoes13
Ok,
In NO WAY EVER is a baby a FML or FHL.... A baby is God's gift! For those who don't believe in God, a baby i STILL a gift right?
To the OP: Ehh, the steam blows over quickly. Tell him tomorrow night or something.
#89 - On 04/28/2009 at 7:19am by LiveLoveLife
@ #94 : no, she's a dude, that's why she's pregnant ._.
#96 - On 01/27/2010 at 11:44am by mindcontrolify
Oh, because anyone who says that phrase means it literally. It's basically saying "if I ever do have kids, I would raise them right, and not have little bastards" so it's really not that big of a deal.
#95 - On 01/26/2010 at 9:17pm by tdawgheath
