that would have been classic

So not an FML. Honestly, if you didn't ask her out right then and there (which would have been epic and she couldn't say no), you lost all right to your testicles.

Pretty sure you wouldn't have 53, and pretty sure you don't know many girls very well if you think they wouldn't be able to say no.

It's called a joke bro. Learn to take one.

Yeah. It was a joke someone had already made and you just sounded like an idiot repeating as though you had any experience with girls.

"You're my girlfriend now..."

I was adding on to it. I guess some girls just don't have a sense of humor. This site must suck for you.

Also, you responded to my post as if I was being serious, which still means you couldn't see it as a joke. I find it hilarious how you fail to realize how much of an idiot you look like.

ohhh Poonjabi

A football player going down on the hottest girl in school without pants. Wow, how surprising.

Xader wins at life.

this should be an MLIA

LMFAO!

ignore the angry girl. Any girl with a sense of humor would love that. It's not like he intentionally attacked her.

It's not really. It would've been an FML if he fell on the wheelchair kid on the sideline, thus breaking the kids' arms off and leaving him to wobble the rest of his life.

Um... pretty freaking embarrassing to be butt naked at school event. Worse that he fell on a girl and I'm sure she was freaked by his public weiner. Yeah, it's an FML.

It all depends on how you take it. If you're a loser with no confidence, you'll blush and embarassingly run off and people will make fun of you for the rest of your life. FML Or, you could be like, "Duff Man, ohhh yeahhh!! Feel the looooveee!!" -pelvic thrust and run through the crowd of shocked parents, cheering friends and jealous losers with no confidence- Then wink at the girl and get a date. MLIG Or, if she says no, that's really not the worst of your troubles at that point. MLIA

Again, it really depends on what you make out of the situation.

more like a LML

this is a FML because OP doesn't have a long enough manhood =)

FML b/c she had pants

Funny thing is, there's at least a 90% chance you wouldn't do anything like that IRL. Really easy to be a hypocrite on the internet, isn't it?

seconded. YDI

Actually, ... it's SCORE!!

Esp since OP was playing Tight End. Oh! *rim shot*

jk. I gots nothing..

@8 a lot of them cant judge size for shit, be it big or small, so when flaccid you should be afraid. i knew a girl once who didnt actually realise it changes size, just hardness. its sad really. but the same goes for men, most guys dont know shit about female anatomy.

Yeah i spose. But i reckon most guys have a decent understanding of female anatomy. With the a amount of pornograhy the majority of white teenagers view, they get decent "education" from that (for lack of a better word)

amen to that. We know everything.

Porn videos don't cover everything... porn stories come closer.

#16 might I ask why you say the amount of porn "white" teenagers bier? As if white teenagers are worse than other racial groups? More importantly, why are you bringing race into things? I know I'm the one calling attention to it, but I was wondering what made that an important enough piece tht you added it...

Because they can afford it

Yeah, right. I'm sure you little virgins don't even know what fallopian tubes are.

i agree wit bexox. because we all know that everytime a man has sex they dig around the inside the female so they will know their anatomy. i mean i couldnt imagine getting off without scraping off some o that ovary lining. mmhmmm thats the stuff

#16 do you think white guys are the only ones who watch porn, you stupid piece of shit?

@16 i hardly think porn qualifies in teaching anything about anatomy other than stick your dick in and she loves it...which, by the way, is crap in most cases lol

@79 course i do, theyre the french underground subway duh.

@86 yeh you show em, be proud that all races are porn watchers, its definately an achievement deserving of recognition by god! not at all that the guy is white and is therefore commenting only on the race hes familiar with...cos thatd just be logical and non racist, which clearly cant be right.

Well sextacy, or whatever your name is, these guys are braggin about how much "anatomy" they know from watching porn. Yeah, it's so educational. And so realistic too.
That's part of anatomy, in case you didn't know.

AHAHA! WIN!

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.

If you'd count this as a notch, you're a fucking virgin

#81 if you'd consider that a serious comment, you're a fucking moron.

as if that's a bad thing, you idiot

I'd have to say it sounds that way! Too movie like lol

Yeah, I think so too. Pants don't rip that easy.

If he was playing flag football and wearing PE shorts, then it's possible that the guy who pulled off his flags could have easily pulled off his shorts(and boxers). The FML doesn't say that they ripped.

well said.

Erm, dove IS the past tense of dive. Whilst it is chiefly a North American word, it has been acceptable as part of the English lexicon for several hundred years.

BAM!

dive verb (dived or (N Amer) dove , diving)

Dictionary disagrees. Dictionary says American screw up.

Both dived and dove are standard as the past tense of dive. Dived, historically the older form, is somewhat more common in edited writing, but dove occurs there so frequently that it also must be considered standard: The rescuer dove into 20 feet of icy water. Dove is an Americanism that probably developed by analogy with alternations like drive, drove and ride, rode. It is the more common form in speech in the northern United States and in Canada, and its use seems to be spreading. The past participle of dive is always dived.

kinda like hanged and hung then?

#45 - that doesn't rebut the fact N Americans have screwed around with the English language.

#58 - no a person is hanged until death, everything else is hung.

I always thought that a dove was a bird. Silly Brits

$84, it's called a dialect. It's not "screwing up the English language." If making changes to a language is screwing it up, I guess brits screwed up the Latin/Germanic/etc languages...

#88 it's the Brits that don't use dove as a verb.

#89 at least we melded their languages to form our own, all you've done is taken our language and decided to speak and to spell it badly, that's not doing anything with the language apart from failing.

Geez, #101. If you're going to criticize (yes, I totally spelled that with a z) people for butchering the English language, don't try to prove your point with bad grammar. Run-on sentences aren't cool.

I promise I'm not a grammar Nazi. :P The irony was just funny.

pointerdog, shut the fuck up. I'm sorry that we, Americans (and Canadians, apparently), residents of the continent thousands of miles away from your home, speak differently than you do. Obviously we're going to use YOUR language to create ours, you fucking colonized much of North America. Obviously we're going to change it as time passes, we're thousands of miles away from you (as I previously stated). Now stop complaining because OUR language (yes, our English language. Would you rather that I say you and I speak the exact same language? Because we don't. We spell words differently and we have different verb tenses) is different from yours and be happy that you probably don't see all that many Americans. (I'm assuming you live in GB based on your clear unhappiness with Canadians/Americans).

And stop trying to be a grammar Nazi when the reason for the "mistake" is obviously a culture/language thing. Try to spend more time attacking people who actually are ruining English (AKA: ppl who like 2 type like ths).

101 - Was your recent discovery of dental hygiene found in North America?

103 - run on sentences aren't bad grammar, they're ineloquent at worst :)

104 - you seem like a very angry person. You're anger has led to illogical arguments. If you adopted our language, distance from the source does not require you to change it. Also I'm well aware we colonised you, just goes to show you'd be nowhere without us :) Also I don't hate American people, I hate the American mindset (I've got nothing against Canadians apart from their spelling!) Oh and perhaps in your next response, come up with something a little better than grammar Nazi? Perhaps something that shows you actually understand history.

106 - er?

How can you hate individual Americans for something the society as a whole did many years ago? I had no control over the changing of the language, and to be honest I use some British phrases that not many Americans use. It's not like I hate Britain or whatever I just hate the ones that hate all Americans because most Americans are arrogant morons. That's like hating all Germans because of the Nazis.

Oh please the English language is already messed up. Even weird is spelled weirdly.

Pointer, "You're anger?"
Really? And you complain about Americans butchering the English language.

"Distance from the source does not require you to change it?"

No, it's not distance from the source, it's just the evolution of language. Obviously, the languages won't evolve the same, since they are seperated. Don't tell me English is the same over in Great Britain as it was hundreds of years ago.

Way to show the world you don't know what 'second base' is... apparently you've never been there!!

LOL

Either gym class or a school game, he'd be wearing a supporter/cup.
OP forgot that detail in his little dream-fantasy.

This is not true. In gym class I never wore a cup when I was in school

agreed xD...

Ya bro you just mad high school history. In fact you just made Pure History. Your Life Rules!

Not sure all girls are turned on by guys diving on top of them without pants. Obviously if it was hot it wouldn't be as bad of an experience, but let's be honest, girls aren't as turned on by things like that as guys are. And I'm not trying to generalize, but based on the comments here, it's pretty obvious that a guy would be thrilled if the opposite happened to him.