Miscellaneous: Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of... - FML

By guessthatsatrickthen - 31/10/2015 17:19 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of trick or treaters. It was actually a naked man. He wanted to come in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 172

You deserved it 1 969

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By Shocked - 28/01/2018 19:00

Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 688

You deserved it 430

By Anonymous - 10/04/2011 06:05 - United States

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 289

You deserved it 4 522

By Anonymous - 08/10/2012 22:27 - Canada - Truro

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 714

You deserved it 40 580

By hellphone_fml - 01/07/2019 20:00

Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 648

By DarkDolly - 04/02/2012 16:39 - France

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 026

You deserved it 3 173

By Lilly_28 - 11/08/2009 14:01 - United States

Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 972

You deserved it 18 432

By Anonymous - 28/07/2015 18:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while in a hotel, I left the room to get some ice. Since my parents left the door wedged open, I didn't worry about trying to find the room number. Without thinking, I walked in to another room that was also wedged open. Yes, there were people in it, and yes, they were both naked and hairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 959

You deserved it 9 200

By anonymous - 16/11/2011 03:17 - Canada

Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 449

You deserved it 33 911

By noooo - 08/08/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 014

You deserved it 2 703

By trickortreat - 01/11/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, while up in my room getting ready to go out, I thought I heard some trick or treaters knocking on the door. I ignored them because I didn't have any candy. The knocking got louder and longer. I walked downstairs, and noticed that the living room ceiling was falling down onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 577

You deserved it 5 089

Next

Top comments

LadyKayDee 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:31

Maybe he wanted to give you some of his candy...

jayennachristine 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:32

trick or treat...or anal?

Comments

COURT_KING 14

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:27

There are some things that cannot be unseen...

countryguy91290 16

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:27

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

laurenswims13 24

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:27

Well did he say trick or treat?

beeferjay 34

Sunday 1 November 2015 16:18

it was a trick and a treat

Lalala579121 27

Sunday 1 November 2015 20:59

OP didn't see it as much of a treat though.

mxgirl1998 26

Wednesday 4 November 2015 0:56

that wasn't the candy op was hoping to see xD

sa5v 21

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:29

What did you do op?

HoboMeth 33

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:30

I guess they wanted to treat you OP

xTommytheGUNx 15

Sunday 1 November 2015 19:59

treat yo self

LadyKayDee 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:30

That could have been his costume.

Welshite 39

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:30

He was just wearing his birthday suit. It's a perfectly legitimate costume.

masoko_fml 21

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:31

That sure is a scary costume..!

LadyKayDee 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:31

Maybe he wanted to give you some of his candy...

WordBea 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:32

Is that not how things work?

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The Top

Today, I confronted my ex-employer about the money he owes me. He'd said he would pay me $3000. He asked me if I had it in writing. I said no. He said, “Well, too bad for you. No leg to stand on.” Then, in a cringey Indian accent, “Thank you, come again!” and slammed the door in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 97

Today, my girlfriend refused to have sex with me, because my underwear are Fruit of the Loom instead of Hanes. According to her, since all real men wear Hanes, I'm unfit to have sex with her because I wear Fruit of the Loom and am therefore not a man. FML

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The Top

Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML

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You deserved it 8 815

Today, after having recently moved into shared accommodations, my prankster of a room-mate has somehow made sure I've yet again woken up with a tampon in my mouth. It's been three times in the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 964

You deserved it 2 183

Today, I went through the Taco Bell drive through. The lady at the window handed me my food and receipt. In a moment of insanity, I threw the receipt at the cashier and yelled, "WOOHOO!" I attempted to burn rubber and get the hell out of dodge, only to remember my car was in park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 995

You deserved it 60 691

Today, my mum was watching a program about sexually transmitted diseases. Later on, she started telling me that I should be careful and use the right protection when having sex. Suddenly she stopped and said, "Actually, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t have a boyfriend!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 573

You deserved it 5 247

Today, I was giving a presentation when my voice cracked like a teenage boy going through puberty. The audience giggled every time it happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 606

You deserved it 66

Today, I learned my wife wasn't speaking to me because our daughter told her I kissed another woman. My daughter neglected to mention that this happened when she came to work with me yesterday, and the kiss was between me and the dummy I use to teach my interns CPR. My wife doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 833

You deserved it 2 783