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zymn

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zymn
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 July 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 16836
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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zymn's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

zymn's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18841) - you deserved it (42239)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, my 6 year old son learned that if you give a mouse a cookie, he will ask for a glass of milk. But if you give a hamster a cookie, he will try to shove the whole thing in his mouth, choke, and die. FML

#5868589
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40018) - you deserved it (4297)

On 10/17/2009 at 5:08pm - kids - by hamster cookie - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized that acne is a major side effect of a medication I'm taking. The medication is to help me with my anxiety. The acne is creating more anxiety. And the more anxious I get, the more meds I need. And the more my face breaks out. FML

#5861611
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32245) - you deserved it (4257)

On 10/17/2009 at 2:26am - health - by JoJo - United States (Iowa)

Today, I met some guys from my dad's workplace. They told him what a pretty daughter he had, to which he responded, "Nah, it's just shit-loads of makeup." FML

#5857727
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31001) - you deserved it (6424)

On 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm - misc - by SheWentCrayola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my girlfriend called me and told me "she has a surprise for me when I got home" in a sexy voice. So, I hurried home only to find a note saying she left me and took my dog. Deeply depressed, I went into the living room. She took my TV also. FML

#5851375
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35380) - you deserved it (2513)

On 10/16/2009 at 1:33pm - animals - by syn1734 - United States

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

#5136850
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10352) - you deserved it (44114)

On 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by JuicyJohn (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I switched from a pediatrician to an adult doctor. The guy was really persistant about a few personal questions. Then he brought my parents in the room and told them that I have an abnormally small penis and what remedies he knows of to fix it. FML

#5130583
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49146) - you deserved it (3247)

On 09/08/2009 at 5:17pm - misc - by dude5028 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was riding on the Moscow metro. My friend and I were joking around in English about taking a nap on the nerdy business man next to me. As we laughed and made comments about him, which we thought he couldn't understand, he asked, "First time in Moscow?" FML

#5126922
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5138) - you deserved it (73374)

On 09/08/2009 at 1:30pm - misc - by HotToTrotskyite (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I spent hours consoling my girlfriend for getting dumped by the guy she was cheating on me with. FML

#5124019
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24018) - you deserved it (66018)

On 09/08/2009 at 8:29am - love - by nitwit (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, it was the first day of my job at a kindergarten. A boy fell over in the playground, so I ran over to see if he was OK. He got up and had a huge red mark on the side of his face. Shocked, I yelled "Oh my god, your face!" Turns out it's a very large port-wine birthmark and now he won't stop crying. FML

#5119886
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35635) - you deserved it (12842)

On 09/08/2009 at 12:42am - kids - by GhettoBeast (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I met some of my boyfriend's family for the first time. His aunt said I was really cute, which made me happy. As we were leaving I said "Your aunt thought I was cute." His reply..."Yeah, well, my aunt's on drugs". FML

#5086042
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40057) - you deserved it (3570)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:33pm - love - by me (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML

#5000239
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40713) - you deserved it (6205)

On 09/02/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by littlemissignored (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord. Meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML

#4971137
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12106) - you deserved it (38683)

On 09/01/2009 at 3:30am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

#4958000
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82747) - you deserved it (4854)

On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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