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zoeyblack7789770

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zoeyblack7789770

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 7 February 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 298
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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zoeyblack7789770's favorite FMLs

Today, after 5 years of no intimate, sexual contact with a woman, I finally got my chance. Unfortunately, I also discovered that I have full-on erectile dysfunction. I'm 23 years old. FML

#18491546
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36410) - you deserved it (3545)

On 12/12/2011 at 1:23am - intimacy - by brokedick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, it's my sister's birthday. My parents got her a cat. I have serious allergies when it comes to cats. When I brought this issue up with my parents, they replied, "This day is not about you, it's about your sister." I can feel my throat tightening already. FML

#18005415
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34535) - you deserved it (2889)

On 10/17/2011 at 7:46am - health - by Cats...FML (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was at work as a cashier. An old lady unbagged everything I had, and angrily "taught" me how to bag. She put potatoes on her eggs and broke them. She then screamed that I was useless and retarded in front of all my other customers and manager. FML

#17925630
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32522) - you deserved it (1958)

On 10/07/2011 at 1:55am - work - by bdjsbskl - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML

#17844542
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26642) - you deserved it (2170)

On 09/27/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52012) - you deserved it (2610)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to explain to a woman I didn't know that my husband was killed overseas. She replied, "I know exactly how you feel, my dog died last month." FML

#17793526
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42112) - you deserved it (2862)

On 09/21/2011 at 3:01am - animals - by socks - United States

 Today, my mom is marrying my ex boyfriend's dad. The same ex boyfriend who I caught cheating on me with my sister. Family gatherings are going to be such a joy! FML

#17793249
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41934) - you deserved it (2489)

On 09/21/2011 at 1:53am - misc - by AL - United States (California)

Today, I was in a restaurant with my fiancée for dinner. I commented that she had some food around her mouth. She responded with a lecture, then by throwing her hot bowl of noodles at me, before stomping out the restaurant. FML

#17634135
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24370) - you deserved it (3865)

On 09/01/2011 at 6:14am - misc - by Anonymous - China (Shanghai)

Today, my family dragged me to an Alien-themed museum. They're convinced they were once abducted and felt up by creatures from outer space. They talk, and spend all their money, on nothing else. I'm hungry. FML

#17462682
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25900) - you deserved it (2483)

On 08/13/2011 at 7:21pm - misc - by Help (woman) - United States

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43456) - you deserved it (3561)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend "Actually, its a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML

#16640973
369 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56120) - you deserved it (4047)

On 06/13/2011 at 5:11am - misc - by Bechara (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, I bought my fiancée a dress for her birthday. She accused me of saying she was fat, because I bought it in medium rather than small. After trying on the dress, she's now not only mad at me for buying it, but also because the dress fits perfectly. FML

#15252423
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42133) - you deserved it (4085)

On 03/09/2011 at 5:27pm - love - by drebel (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I logged onto a website that offered free tutoring. After chatting with the online tutor, he started flirting with me. I was just looking for some help with my homework, not a creeper. FML

#14876662
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24216) - you deserved it (5602)

On 02/07/2011 at 12:26am - misc - by Chasity (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was driving my family home, when my 7 year old son had to pee. Having long since passed any rest stops, I made him use a bottle. Once he was done, he grenaded the bottle out the window, hitting someone's windshield dead on. FML

#14186917
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10427) - you deserved it (30436)

On 12/13/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by wtfson -

Today, at my wedding reception, I jokingly asked my aunt, who has always been convinced that I am gay despite my protests, if she believed me now. She took this the wrong way and drunkenly went around telling my guests that my wedding was a sham to convince her I was straight. FML

#14128663
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (4640)

On 12/08/2010 at 4:40am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)



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