zjjohnston

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zjjohnston

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 513
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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zjjohnston's page activity

Visits<b>jrec</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:41am<b>jillytc</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 4:50pm<b>WubStep_</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 5:26pm<b>tralala453</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 1:47pm<b>kassadishyanne</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 12:39pm<b>Faith13</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 3:07am<b>peacheso</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 6:09am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 2:16am<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 9:01pm<b>Kitastropheee</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 12:56am<b>redblueflame</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 2:55pm<b>cman1322</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 12:35am<b>mattlw</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 7:39pm<b>efelsh</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 6:05pm<b>Dimence</b> - the 04/02/2013 at 10:36pm

zjjohnston's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of zjjohnston's badges

zjjohnston's favorite FMLs

Today, my doctor asked me to undo my bra so he could check my breathing without the straps restricting my lungs, I got home and told my friends how awkward it was. Not one of them has had this happen to them before. We all go to the same doctor. FML

by chestycough / 09/16/2013 at 12:35am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the airport after saying goodbye to my, for some reason, giggling boyfriend. I learnt why he was so cheerful when I opened my purse in front of the guards, only to find pink-furry handcuffs, and a huge dildo. They pretended not to know what it was. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2013 at 11:21am / Norway (Sor-Trondelag) / Intimacy

Today, I lost my dog and so I put up 'lost' signs. As I was coming back home I noticed one had been written on. It said: "Found your dog. Keeping it". FML

by Hurrikhan / 03/23/2013 at 7:43am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Animals

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous