Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About ziqi92 : Chinese - Shanghai descent. DDR Master, rabid Pokemon fan.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I spent the entire day at the hospital and was sent home attached to an obnoxious and somewhat painful heart monitor. I felt fine and decided to go to a bonfire with a few friends. I thought everyone was being nice until I overheard the guys referring to me as an unattractive xbox. FML
Today, I complained to my boyfriend that I was stressed out. He asked me then "What do you have to be stressed out about?" I work 50 hours a week and go to school full time. I ask him what was stressful about his day, he told me that his "kill/death ratio went down on Call of Duty". FML
Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML
Today, I found out I will not be getting my class ring. The jeweler has a policy against doing engravings that contain "obscene or offensive language or phrases". What obscene phrase did I want? My initials and year. W.T.F. 2010. FML
Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
Today, for my birthday, my friends and family gave me: A Wii Fit, a free year at the gym and a book of diet recipes. They didn't consult with each other. I've asked for "something corresponding to me". FML
Today, I discovered that when you're the maid of honor giving a toast at your best friend's wedding, it's important to make sure the zipper on your dress is secured. Otherwise, your bare breasts and Hello Kitty panties could end up exposed to a wedding party of 600 people. FML
Today, I microwaved a cup of soup. While walking back to my desk to eat and do homework, I noticed a message that said, "WARNING: Hold cup by sides, as lid may not be secure." At that exact moment, the lid that I was holding fell off and the soup drenched my Nintendo DS, and printer. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend. I noticed that he had added a signature onto his texts that had the date 11/10/09. At first, I blushed and thought it was the date we had become a couple. But then I realized it was just the day the new Call of Duty game comes out. Love you too. FML
Today, I wrote the most beautiful college application essay ever, ten minutes before the online deadline. Instead of clicking "submit", I clicked the button next to it that said "return". The entire essay vanished into internet wasteland. FML
Tuesday 3 March 2015