Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ziqi92

Search for a member

ziqi92

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8142
  • Number of comments : 362
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About ziqi92 : Chinese - Shanghai descent. DDR Master, rabid Pokemon fan.

ziqi92's page activity

Visits<b>bjt916</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 9:57am<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 11/13/2013 at 7:31am<b>Jenmic</b> - the 10/28/2010 at 10:41pm<b>IhateLazycreeps</b> - the 03/06/2010 at 11:32pm<b>SodapopCurtisGal</b> - the 12/18/2009 at 4:25pm<b>Mersi</b> - the 12/16/2009 at 12:41am<b>leero</b> - the 12/15/2009 at 8:58pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 11/21/2009 at 11:35pm<b>kerrygirl</b> - the 10/28/2009 at 2:50am<b>depinaariana</b> - the 10/25/2009 at 9:08pm<b>banana321</b> - the 08/27/2009 at 10:29pm<b>JukeboxBunny</b> - the 08/21/2009 at 1:12am<b>mari0958</b> - the 08/14/2009 at 7:08pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 08/14/2009 at 6:32pm<b>amrit459</b> - the 07/08/2009 at 6:52pm<b>asdflkj</b> - the 06/16/2009 at 7:33pm<b>the_chin</b> - the 06/15/2009 at 8:29pm<b>amatoryangel</b> - the 06/12/2009 at 12:28am

ziqi92's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ziqi92's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking an important exam for Calculus. Out of nowhere, the kid behind me starts violently kicking my desk. I quickly turn around and yell at him. He was having a seizure. FML

#6804423
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27562) - you deserved it (9431)

On 12/18/2009 at 12:09am - misc - by Ryan (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was watching TV. During a very long commercial break, I found my brothers PSP charger next to me. Out of boredom I put my tongue on the end on the metal. Not only did it fry my tongue but found its way to my metal filling in my tooth. I now have a sore tongue and a throbbing toothache. FML

#6803548
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4658) - you deserved it (71021)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:25pm - misc - by Shocked (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating lunch out side with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML

#6795519
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30602) - you deserved it (2552)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:43pm - animals - by ollierocks96 - United States (Florida)

Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML

#6793560
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12445) - you deserved it (23801)

On 12/17/2009 at 2:09pm - animals - by ohmy (woman) - Canada

Today, I spent five minutes trying to kill a spider with my mind. FML

#6789867
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8454) - you deserved it (38540)

On 12/17/2009 at 4:58am - animals - by AnRom (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the doctor to get a pulled arm muscle checked. I told him I had been bowling, and it had just started to hurt badly. He said it was normal for a man of my age (35) to pull a muscle when lifting a ball of 12-15 pounds. I then told him it was on my son's Wii. FML

#6748353
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9297) - you deserved it (24308)

On 12/14/2009 at 2:49am - health - by WIIslave (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my roommate came in slamming the front door. I guess he doesn't know that you can't throw hot water on frozen windows. He came up all pissed and called his insurance because he cracked the windshield. We have the same car, in the same exact color. Turns out he threw the water on mine. FML

#6705555
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30767) - you deserved it (2600)

On 12/11/2009 at 3:32am - misc - by Sous_Chef (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I'm travelling to England for an important meeting. I'm Norwegian, and my name is Bård. I have to introduce myself as bored the whole day, because that's how my name is pronounced. FML

#6662033
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31791) - you deserved it (2680)

On 12/08/2009 at 7:10am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I finally got a hold of my husband who I haven't actually talked to in 2 and 1/2 weeks since he is deployed and it's hard to chat. He told me he couldn't talk because he was in an epic battle, in Call of Duty. FML

#6650793
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30281) - you deserved it (4183)

On 12/07/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by Dejected (woman) - United States (California)

Today, we brought our Christmas tree inside to decorate. We decorated it, then went out to dinner as a family. Returning 2 hours later, we came back to find our living room to be occupied. Not with people. The tree had been filled with baby spiders, and they were all over the living room. FML

#6609748
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32548) - you deserved it (2895)

On 12/05/2009 at 12:15am - animals - by Worsttreeever (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went on my first date in a long time. We went to see "New Moon." After the girl stole my hat, I grabbed her phone. While trying to get it back, she held a lighter to me, threatening me. Next thing I know my beard is on fire, so not only did I have to sit through horrible acting, I got burnt. FML

#6544765
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32065) - you deserved it (12011)

On 12/01/2009 at 12:00am - love - by toastedguy (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, at 4am, I remembered that I had not studied for my Spanish exam. I panicked, jumped out of bed, and frantically began searching for my notebook. It wasn't until I destroyed my desk and woke up my roommate that I realized that I'm not enrolled in Spanish this semester. It was a nightmare. FML

#6537885
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31274) - you deserved it (8746)

On 11/30/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Stressmess - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

#6494130
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59739) - you deserved it (6384)

On 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by IB6UB9 - United States

Today, I was at a dinner with my dad's girlfriend's family. I met this guy who I found kind of cute and tried to talk to him a couple times. To avoid talking to me he started playing his PSP. I could see the screen perfectly and the PSP was clearly off. FML

#6477296
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27425) - you deserved it (5340)

On 11/27/2009 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262
387 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7231) - you deserved it (80197)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: